First of all, with much anticipation and excitement I stepped into Tampines GV cinema. Something caught my eyes. Behind the counter selling popcorn I saw a picture saying "Cheesy hotdogs 1 for $1". I thought to myself, " not too bad, sounds nice". And then, i saw another huge banner advertising this "Cheesy hotdogs 2 for $2." Now THIS is what i call cheesy. If it is 1 for $1 obviously it will be 2 for $2. DUH! Nice try but that wasn't cheesy enough. You might as well try something like Corny Corn 1 for $1 and Corny Corn 2 for $3.
Alright now on to the movie, i think Victor Krum is a punk. Cmon look at him.
You see, he's bald and he's fierce. He's supposed to be the best seeker in the world and please dont tell me the best seeker in the world looks like some punkass gangsta?
Just look at soccer, the world's best soccer players like Ronaldo, Ronaldinho... okay bad analogy they all look like d33ks. Maybe that's why Victor Krum looks like a d33k. Of course you may say David Beckham looks handsome but then again he's not a soccer player he's a money machine.
They should get someone like
to act as Victor Krum man. And everyone from that school is bald. Kinda gives me the impression that they are from Chinese High/Hwa Chong Institution . Give me the creeps you know with all the communism thingy and all.
And next Cho Chang. She's supposed to be absolutely gorgeous and beautiful but NO! She's absolutely horrendous. Just grab any Singaporean girl and she will be better. RIGHT? If the director really has no options he can always ask Sengkong's girlfriend and she looks way better! We want Chio Chang, not Chou3 Chang.
Next on to the story. There is absolutely something important that is missing from the movie. Can you still remember the part in the story during the Yule Ball where Mad Eye Moody looked at Harry with his mad eye and commented on his socks which were not matching? And Harry replied that they were from Dobby? Yeah. That is very important and now i shall tell you why.
When i was reading that part i was rolfmao. So i think if i were to watch it in the cinema i will also rolfmao. And everyone will also be rolftao. It's the epitome of comedy. It distinguishes a good movie from a lousy movie. It separates the GPA 4.00 from the 3.60. It's so important, it shows at instance whether the director is a noob or a n00b.
If you intepret it correctly it will be crucial to the movie. You see, if Mad Eye were to abuse his xray eyes, it shows that he's a horny bastard and he's not a good guy. And if he is not a good guy then he's not the real Moody and ultimately it means he is a bad guy and he is BARTY CROUCH JUNIOR!.
Secondly those socks were from Dobby the elf. Let's not debate the sewing skills of an elf but those 2 socks were completely different. This shows that Dobby is mentally disabled or suffers from mental problems. And the only reason why Dobby suffers from mental problems is because his owner abused him and his owner/master was once Lucius Malfoy and thus by hasty generalisation we can conclude that Lucius Malfoy is a punkass gangsta.
Thirdly, Harry Potter must have gone potty to wear such socks. We can intepret two things. 1. Harry Potter is weird. 2. Voldemort is so powerful that his avada kedava made harry potter went mad.
Talking of avada kedava the chinese translation was 说变就变. In english "say change then change". What nonsense!
So you see the director left out such an important scene.
I give Hermione 10/10, Harry 9/10, Ron 8/10 and the rest 0/10 which gives an average of 6.75/10 which is not too bad.
To conclude, whoever is directing harry potter and the order of the phoenix, please replace cho change, viktor krum, dumbblydorr and give us more of Dobby the elf.
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1 comment:
You missed out one point, Dumberdore was way tooooooo violent AND why must he tie his beard, it looks damn weird. Oh yah, they completely took away the Rita Seeker part, the part that she turns into a bettle and got caught. That was one of the best parts too. The movie sucks mann.
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