SSSY

When you were studying in the library, have you ever wondered why did it feel hot all of a sudden when special someone walked past you?

That's was sherwin.

Have the girls around you turn their heads all of a sudden to look at a special someone but that special someone was never you?

He was sherwin sim.

Have you ever wondered who is the waterpolo of the great ri team?

Nope, not chenkai, not miao, not jeremy. He's sherwin.

I just want to say that yesterday was that fagut's birthday and i forgot to wish him happy birthday.




Apparently he's so hot that i cant upload a picture of him. But rest assured. Keep the hits coming in and i will let you see SHERWIN SIM SHI YANG WEARING A BRA.

CHINESE O LEVEL

报章报道:政府最近常鼓励社会人士接受坐过牢的罪犯,让他们重新生活.我,胡老大, 听了这则新闻,我不敢相信.

首先, 我胡老大是369 gang 的老大. 我的brothers每天在监狱进进出出, 仿佛是第二个家.所以吗!重新生活我的屁股lah.本来就在生活了.

其次, 我们369 名声着么响.sibeh power. 有谁不要接受我们肯定被我们剁成肉浆.除非你是ho sheng. 你会kick ass. 我们就不敢得罪你.

一言以蔽之,等我进监狱后才来跟我说这些事.

Have fun?

Baskit, today's O levels were super fun. I don't care if I fail because even if I do, I had fun today. AND if I fail it would probably be a D7 - which means no more Chinese in JC. Yay no more mugging of 手册。

In any case, that is not the point. I think I'm going to score full marks after all. And now since it's all over, I get to 如释重负，can 弛懈 like mad!!

It's hard talking about Paper 2, so I'll talk about Paper 1. Especially the 作文。Today my 灵感 was at its maximum point, dy/dx = 0 so I wrote a very powerful essay. In case you don't know what I'm talking about, I'm talking about Question 5 - views on past convicts. Now if you'll listen up in TPH's lessons you'll find this a very easy topic. I found it so easy I almost laughed at the paper.

First part must explain why government want people to accept ex-convicts.

政府为什么要社会人士接受坐过牢的罪犯？
不接受，难道要把他们抛开一旁吗? 如果不接受他们，他们只会重犯，重蹈覆辙 （删减字 - 但是我热爱华文），而这对社会有不良的影响。有了更多的罪犯，那就得花更多的钱来建造监狱。把钱耗资在监狱上，那我们就怎样建造赌场？政府因此就得把搭巴士的价格提高，而从这儿使人民发怒。大家的发怒，就造成了战争。结果，只是天下大乱，那大家也就是罪犯了。我们的前途，也就因为这样而岂不堪虞！

Second part must explain consequences.

如果政府没有这样做，那会对社会有什么影响？
天下大乱之外，我还有一点必须提。没错，天下大乱是个极端的思想，可是那也不是完全不可能的现象。就算不建造新的监狱，罪犯也会同样的被人家藐视。被藐视的感觉，不是每个人能接受的。因此，罪犯可能会精神崩溃，自暴自弃，甚至导致他们去跳楼轻生。他们的死也没关系，因为反正犯了罪，就是对社会没用。俗语说：“不怕一万，只怕万一。”万一他不死，就是有自杀的念头。在新加坡，这可是犯法的！那他们又要返回监狱，面对四堵墙。生活对他们也就会更没有意义，而他们被放出去时又会再尽想办法自杀。这样，我看是没完没了的。

Finally, possible solutions.

提供一些建议犯法。
解决这个方法很简单！干脆不要把他们放进牢里啦！这样，就没有罪犯，就没有自杀。现在社会竞争很强，那我们不如也就把它使得更强？英文说，survival of the fittest. 谁谋杀罪多，谁就是 top frag. 这样不好吗？那杀了最多的人，就会得到花红。头到了最多的钱，也可以得到花红。除了谋杀案之外，这会使大家都会高高兴兴地活在一起。至少它不会有反面的经济现象！因此，这是最好的解决方法。

Shit, if I don't score 70/70 for this, I'm going to take Chinese as H4 subject next year.

Anyway, I had nothing much to do after Chinese Os (duh). No one wanted to shoot birds with me (because they were scared of catching avian flu - but wtf we're killing them). Or play soccer with me and James (they were afraid of getting their arses whooped). Or fly kite with me at Bishan Park - originally MK's idea but he went home to WoW, baskit.

So what I do? GO ORCHARD! (破天荒）

Before you say I've given up my non-buaya ways, let me clarify it was to fill up my stomach. I'm sick of eating J8 and S11 food that I need something new to suit my taste buds. Orchard certainly suited my taste buds, though not my wallet. Luckily tomorrow no school, and soon I think I'll have to fast - though there's only two days left =X Well anyway let's get back to the point.

I guess you could say I went to Orchard for official business, for I also had to get gifts for our dearest FTs - so my intentions for going town were purely for official business. However, upon going about my official business, I discovered that James had some unofficial business to settle. It was also purely coincidental that I noticed there was a cool music shop called HMV just in the building. Naturally, as I intend to be a musician, I had to check out the market.. and it turns out music is turning from bad to worse. I was pondering performing inside the shop but I decided not to in case the people thought I was 招摇过市 or 趾高气扬。In the end, after a detailed analysis of the CD shop and its prices (pretty standard), I rejoined James and all in search for nice gifts for our FTs.

I would say that in the end we settled for half (View from the Bridge again.. -____-) - because we only bought one gift for one FT out of two, which is half; and we bought the gift at half price. So far so good. Then we realised it was too late to shop for another gift - so we decided to go sit down at Macs for some relaxation. We got up, shopped a little more, then went to sit down at BK.

And a little thought occurred to me.
How the hell does one shop so long at Orchard?

Sure, I can run 20 rounds around a track but if you ask me to go 20 rounds around Centrepoint I'll just drop dead in the centre of Centrepoint wondering what's the point. Shopping is rather meaningless, but like I said earlier I was there for official business and what's done just had to be done. This is my 责无旁贷 responsibility. I guess it's 咎由自取.. as bloody monitor of the class. Or maybe I'm just extra, 自找麻烦。

In any case, because I went Orchard today, I think I have a life. Even though it was for official business, a visit to Orchard is still a visit to Orchard. Similarly, full marks in Chinese is also full marks in Chinese - tyco or not. Therefore, I think I spent my day very well. Very fun.

(Stay tuned for an exclusive interview on TCS tomorrow!)

Talk cock for o levels

Walao, today o levels paper 1 was damn imba la, so many people got tuition teacher who did the exact same question with them before. At least one idiot memorised the whole freaking thing. It's like knowing all six numbers for the next Toto draw. Me, I had to rely on my poor brain cells,自力更生。

Anyway, lemme talk about paper 2 since yh and yj are talking about paper 1. It's chicken feed, assuming that there is no bird flu. In fact, I think I had some spare points to throw around, so I decided to play punk with my 造句。

孕育:那些极端派的回教学校正在孕育下一代的恐怖分子.

Ok sorry only got one, I'm not brave enough. And during the course of paper 2, there was this damn irritating handphone that kept vibrating on the teacher's table every 15 minutes. And the teacher didn't know how to switch it off. It was this very lousy no-colour motorola peanut phone and it made the invigilator fed up. Maybe it managed to break the concentration of everyone in that class. But that wasn't the worst thing. The worst thing was that the phone is mine. Ok then again I might be the only one in the class not bothered by it so it's still alright... for me.

I was very bothered by the China scholars also. I was still starting my 长文缩短 when all of them got up and left. It's like a blatant show of disrespect. How can they not wait for everyone to finish? So selfish. In contrast, I am never like that. I always wait for everyone to finish before I leave.

o levels has been a very enlightening experience.

Break

I'm not like those sort of idiot who says Chinese Os coming up.. need take break from blogging. No. I'm just saying we all need a break from Chinese. So here's some scandals that are non-Chinese. Woo hoo! Of course, the people involved are Chinese, but I'm not going to blog about it in Chinese.

What is the similarity between Dorothy's handphone and Sportsman Shawn?
They both get turned on by Dorothy.

What is the difference between Dorothy's handphone and Sportsman Shawn?
One will eventually get turned off by Dorothy, but the other never will.

Why doesn't Sportsman Shawn want to take Sciences?
Because Dorothy isn't a Science.

Why does Sportsman Shawn want to take Humans/Arts?
Because Dorothy's a Human and Shawn finds her a work of Art.

What does Shawn's relationships have in common with Jin's tests?
There is a lot of cheating going on.

Sorry for any inconvenience caused. If you don't like my jokes, just tell me privately and I'll remove it. I always try to be nice and usually do not have even the slightest intention of harming anyone.

Revision for Chinese

Q: It's a glorious day and the sun is shining. What am I doing at home?
A: Mugging for Higher Chinese "O" levels!! DUH!!

Some people have complained that if I type everything in Chinese, it would be very difficult for them to understand. I find this a little ridiculous, since my standard of Chinese is not even like, 水到渠成。Anyway, after another visit to 陈某人, I feel the inspiration to post again. This time, I'll provide you a complete guide on how to score full marks for your Chinese paper.

I am qualified to teach you this because:
(1) Although I scored 61/110 for RI prelims, I could have scored full marks if I wrote with my right hand.
(2) Although I scored 67.5/110 for the NY paper, I could have scored full marks if I wrote my answers in simplified Chinese characters (because I wouldn't have to think before I write).
(3) Although I scored 65/110 for the SN paper (which I did today), I could have scored full marks if I read the 理解问答 and 长文缩短 passages.
(4) I can score full marks any day with the answer script in my hand.
(5) Although my marks are not great for any particular paper that I have taken, I like to 一鸣惊人。And "O" levels will be easier to I'll score full marks.

Now you 心服口服？Let's start.

一 填写汉字 （5题10分）
You have two options: (1) Mug 手册 and 词语表, (2) Be China.
If (2) is not applicable to you, then do (1). Now I always score full marks for this section, and it's thanks to my 手册 and my 词语表。That one is 无庸置疑。

二 填写词语 （5题10分）
This one very easy. Don't come and kpkb. With 汉语拼音 and you still can't score full marks, you really ought to kick yourself in the arse. And my advice is the same with regards to 填写汉字。

三 造句 （5题15分）
Important to note is that the shorter your sentence, the less mistakes you are likely to make. I admit I've been rather long-winded in my 例句 yesterday, but nevertheless they are all correct. However, as your standard of Chinese might not be as good as mine =X, I encourage you not to write long sentences. It's like sticking your head out of a car window on CTE 7pm Friday night.

Here's an example: 荆棘
Smart way: 我昨天在公园看到荆棘。（3)
Stupid way (sure got mistake): 他有着坚强的意志，可以越过生活上的荆棘。 (0)

Always take the 造句 at face value. If you want to take silly risks by having long sentences or trying to play punk with the words, you'll only die a horrible death. Even if you get a strict marker when you write sentence number 1, theoratically he/she cannot give you a 0. So you'd better be sure when you do stupid 造句 that it is 100% correct. Otherwise you're screwed, and it's none of my business.

四 综合填空 （10题20分）
One of the easiest sections of the paper (other than 理解问答 and 长文缩短）。You are given four choices, and among them one of them is surely nonsense. Eliminate that. Your chances of getting the correct one is now 1 in 3. First you anyhow tikam one, then you change your choice (provided you know that another of them is wrong). Note that the probability of getting it right after the change is 2 in 3 (it's mathematically proven okay!), so it's always good to change. This is how you maximise your chances.

Of course, if you know the answer and are cocksure about it, then you put it down. (废话！）

If you don't, you can always do it the Literature way aka A View From The Bridge way aka Settle For Half. Just take the two most likely answers, and 水乳交融。Then you would definitely get at least one mark for one 错别字。

This is not called cheating, this is called 技巧！

五 理解问答 （6题30分）
My favourite section. Basically you copy the passage for everything, and look like you're not copying anything. Then for the second last question, where they usually ask for meaning of sentences, you give model answer. Must act pro and include as many 成语 as you possibly can into the answer. Even if the examiner doesn't get what you're trying to say, he/she will be visibly impressed. Full marks.

Last question is usually 你同意吗？or 你赞成吗？I'm telling you a secret: The answer is always yes. Trust me!! You say no only they come after you. And for this question, the best is to usually act very morally upright, and pretend you're some saint or something. I, of course, don't have to act. I could just be my natural self and score full marks, but that's because I'm already very morally upright. However, it is those cheaters and those morally downleft (opposite of upright) who can act the best - so I believe they can act morally upright if they want. That way also full marks.

Just don't come and play punk with the examiner. He decides your marks.

六 长文缩短 （1题25分）
The most imba section, because 1 question only but 25 marks.

The trick is to keep it to 135 words - for that is abusing the system to the maximum. And you must 顾名思义，长文缩短 means 长文缩短。Meaning you keep your answer short AND keep your sentences short. Long sentences only serves to piss off the examiner and waste your words, because long sentences need conjunctions and you can't afford to waste your precious words on conjunctions. Silly things like "既然..就" and "因为..所以". Waste time and words only. And since time = money, you waste money.

Might as well go re-write the whole passage. So take my advice and keep it short. Then you'll get another full marks in the bag.

Oops. That's full marks for the whole paper already.

Nobody said it was difficult.

Sadly, I cannot impart my 作文 and 应用文 knowledge to you because I haven't went to memorise model answers yet. BUT! If you're lucky maybe YL and YH will come explain it to you.. though I doubt very much they have the time to. In any case, with 110/110 for your 试卷二，you are bound to get an A1 overall. Unless you're a total jackass who can't write any Chinese for nuts, then you jolly well deserve to screw up. Plus, I think you deserve a kick in the arse for scoring full marks in the main paper but failing to get an A1 overall. That one is 不可原谅, you can go 自生自灭 for that.

In any case, this is all I have to share. I know I'm like some great 大公无私, 慷慨解囊 person - but it's okay you don't have to thank me for this. I just 助人为快乐之本。Just that if you get your A1 for Chinese, remember to have 反哺之心 and treat me. If you don't have and want to treat me, that's fine with me also. I very 无所谓，as long as I have 渔翁得利。Just treat the Chinese paper like the Maths or Chemistry paper and all will be fine.

Take first two sections like straight-answer type questions. Take 造句 as writing equations. Take 综合填空 as MCQ. Take 理解问答 as designing an experiment. And take 长文缩短 as differentiation, and leave your answer as a single fraction (paragraph). Like that only.. what's there to be scared of? Don't 提心吊胆，must 义无反顾地把它做好！Then 不会辜负老师的殷切希望。

Best of luck to everyone tomorrow. Including myself.

Let's all score full marks.

陈某人的忠言

听人们常说 - 忠言逆耳利于行，良药苦口利于病！

今天，我要讲我华文老师，陈某人，的忠言。（他真的有这样讲。）听了之后保证你O水准能考到A1。如果拿不到A1，那你就直接去找陈某人。他的忠言，与我无关。我只是帮他传授靠到好成绩的秘诀。

1) 不要提心吊胆！
2）做卷小心翼翼！
3）读书包罗万象！

就是那么的简单。到底是哪一个笨蛋说忠言逆耳呢?

还有，我好像感到有些人没有充分地准备好考试。但你不必忧心忡忡，因为幸好有我在！我会提供一些造句例句，好让大家参考。我这次在O水准考试是希望破天荒得到满分，所以特地隔天去找陈某人来商量怎样得到满分。结果，我胸有成竹，这满分我是拿定了！

你如果想要跟我一样成功，那就学我一点的造句。我也会从以前所提供的造句重复一下，希望大家不会介意。你就算介意，也不关我的事。你不要照抄我的句子，那你也就凶多吉少了。因此，你最好去好知为知，尽想办法同我得到满分。

1 前提：考试前提早读书，成绩依然会变得更优秀。

2 活灵活现：老师说我写的字乱七八糟，可是我却觉得我的字是活灵活现的。

3 销声匿迹：我看我离开莱佛士书院以后，在学校的天才也自然会销声匿迹了。

4 狼藉：这个图书馆很好，有关动物的书籍多，所以有很多狼藉。

5 似是而非：她从远看来像个chiobu，可是似是而非，她却不是，真可惜。

6 老马识途：我每次忘记带课本，会被老师叫去借一本；过了几次，我老马识途，知道跟谁借了。

7 遏制：他的怒不可遏制造了很多麻烦。

8 问津：他不知道厕所在哪里，所以去找美女来问津，问得津津有味。

9 正经：我正经过厕所，突然看到我的朋友到里面去小便。

10 绵长：这丝绵长度都不到一尺，你叫haram穿，简直是莫名其妙。

11 大吹大擂：他要主持一个华乐团，所以叫了几个会大吹大擂的同学来参与。

12 自斟自酌：这里没厕所；你如果需要小便，就得自斟自酌，带你自己的水壶来。

13 提心吊胆：今天有陈老师的课，而我没有带课本，就提心吊胆，准备被他拉耳朵。

14 表率：他的手表率极了。

15 抨击：我知道我的造句是十全十美的，你就算要抨击，也还得给我满分。

16 搅扰：每当上华文课时，我想睡觉都会被老师搅扰，真是好烦啊！

17 混水摸鱼：我掉进海里，结果混水摸鱼。

18 鸡犬不宁：yuk lun退出 NBA 的那一天，我就咒他家的鸡犬不宁。

19 咎由自取：如果我这次的造句不拿满分，你可不要怪我不客气，反而要怪自己咎由自取！

20 杜绝：我听过很多明星的歌曲，阿杜绝对是最烂的！

21 青出于蓝：我不小心把不同颜色的油漆一起混，所以有时会青出于蓝。

22 叛徒：我班的lembu要从ＲＩ到ＡＣＳＩ去，可称是一个叛徒。

23 高瞻远瞩：你这个矮冬瓜想要高瞻远瞩，有没有搞错！！

24 显赫一时：ho sheng 设立 raffles critics 时就显赫一时，过后就不知道死到哪里去。

25 招徕: 他使出绝招徕对付我，还好我闪得快。

26 面面相觑：那摊主不懂是怎样烹饪的，给我煮了一碗面面相觑的面。

27 复苏：他正在重复苏老师所说的话，请你听一听。

28 诡异：我这次的CT每科都及格，可称是件诡异的事。

29 肇始：是那个王八蛋，肇始了raffles critics的垃圾。

30 得意忘形：你这个死 haram，肚子圆得像满月，napfa 2.4 跑了三十分钟就要得意忘形，什么意思！

31 吃里爬外：他虽然看起来是个好老师，但是他其实只在吃里爬外，中饱私囊。

32 空前绝后：在会考里得到满分，虽然说是件空前绝后的事，但是我绝对相信我是能办得到的！

33 融合：希望我们能其乐融融合作愉快！

34 外寇：最近学校有很多偷窃的案件，我们怀疑犯罪者是从外寇贼，比如说 elango 这一般的人。

35 孤苦伶仃：danny 本来要发给 liesl 电邮，可是电脑却玩太多 dota 而坏了；本来可以 仃-a-伶，现在只好孤苦伶仃。

这样够了吧？不够你可以再来找我的徒弟。我的徒弟的手提电话96327153，如果打错电话不关我的事！

我希望你能了解我不给你我自己的手提电话的原因。因为我如果给你我的手提电话，那我的电话费就一定会很高。我虽然乐于助人，但是不喜欢把我的血汗钱耗资在手提电话的费用。

好了，时间不早了。我写的就到此为止，马上就搁笔。

谢谢。

公鸡..................

老大启...............

2005年10月29日

Attendance

I would like to bring to your attention the attendance of class 4J in recent times.

Friday, 21st of October - 28 present, 5 absent (okay that's not so bad)



But wtf - Monday, 24th of October - 22 present, 11 absent?! I've got proof.



Even as we review CT scripts, attendance doesn't improve by a lot. Not in the morning anyway.
Tuesday, 25th of October - 29 present, 4 absent
Wednesday, 26th of October - 28 present, 5 absent

After CT results are released..
Thursday, 27th of October - 21 present, 12 absent (record!)

And today..
Friday, 28th of October - 29 present, 4 absent (not bad la)

Seems like there is a small pattern going on. I predict that there will be 5 people absent on Monday. Oops - it might be possible that those five do not take Mother Tongue. Forget it then.

Since the pudge boy (YH's terms) likes to bet so much, we'll have a little bet on the attendance on Wednesday. Please note that since there is no FT now and L Tan is constantly checking on what I do, late means absent and absent means late.

Odds:
0 absent pays 6900-1
1 absent pays 12-1 (note the sharp dy/dx)
2 absent pays 8-1
3 absent pays 6-1
4 absent pays 3-1
5 absent pays 4-3
6 absent pays 6-1 (like a six..)
7 absent pays 15-1
>7 absent pays 100-1 (note 0 absent pays more)

Do note that Wednesday is that last official day of school before graduation, so people would surely come.. or would they? Haha it's up to you. Bets may be placed on the tagboard or at the talkcocksummit email, but not to my personal email. I've got this feeling I'll be rich by Wednesday haha.

Meanwhile, TCS would like to take the opportunity to wish everyone good luck for Higher Chinese "O" Levels. Even if you're not taking it this year, we are wishing you good luck for next year. If you're not Chinese, then we wish you good luck for whenever you intend to take up Higher Chinese as a subject and take its O levels.

Yes, good luck to everyone once again. I'll try to post up some useful tips to help you in the exams by tomorrow or Sunday, but no promise. You'll just have to cross your fingers and hope that I have the time to improve all of your grades. After all, everyone getting A1 means everyone happy. If only I get A1 only I happy, but then again I get bragging rights. So you better hope I feel generous this weekend.

SLG Proposal

Well since Raffles Critics have come up with their proposal, I don't see why I shouldn't come up with one. After all, the Critics (with capital letter!) from Raffles seem to be very very popular people. So I think I should aim to get popularity by putting up my own proposal.

However, while their SLG stands for "Student Leader Groups", mine stands for "Stupid Little Gays" - the little faguts which are polluting the school. WE MUST BE RID OF THEM! AND WE RECOGNISE THEM! THERE WILL BE NO COMPROMISE!!

Okay that was quite Hitler. Influence of 4J.

In any case, today we bring up three issues to try and improve the school. Raffles Critics are so critical that they want the intangible changed - like the RIPB, the CECC, etc. Me? I'm a stupid boy and cannot see what isn't there. So I'm going to tell you what I want to change - and it is all very see-able. And I'm going to tell you in very simple language, because I can't do it with difficult words. Sorry la - I told you I was a 笨小孩 many times before.

A. Ridding the school of SLGs
Also known as fagut cleansing. First we go to the Sec 1s, find all the arrogant little bastards who think they're damn big, and then we wipe them out.

Death penalties include:
1) Fragging from the fourth floor of Junior Block while the culprits stand on the first floor waiting to be hit.
2) Placing them in the toilet while a prefect does his binary fission in the next cubicle. Put crudely, while a prefect shits.
3) Getting Body Slam from a VIP of the school. Note it's not just "Slam", it's "Body Slam".
4) Putting him in the middle of 4J with Adnaan playing tennis ball with a cricket bat.
5) Using runes to turn him into a Carl Yan, who has plans to defect to ACJC.

Hope the Humanities Department won't come after us telling us to be humanitarian in our punishments. I mean, at least we don't use poison gas (though suggestion number 2 comes close) or firing squad. Partly because we don't have any firing squad, except the silly Air Rifle Club, now known as Raffles Shooting Club. But then again they only fire blanks, so no point putting those bastards in front of the Shooting Club - they'll miss even though it's point blank range. Because they make it a point to fire blanks.

Anyway refer to yesterday's post on Insolence, and perhaps you'll find why there is a need to rid the school of such faguts.

B. Change in GPA system
I find that having 80% to get a GPA 4 is slightly ridiculous. Actually, it's bloody ridiculous. That's just too freaking high and people like me will never be able to get it. As a result, I 心灰意懒，and refuse to work harder for the next CT. This goes in a vicious cycle, and thus it never ends. The GPA system has to change!

I have two suggestions for the school. The first is the easier to implement, for it teaches Maths as well as pragmatism. Use the dGPA/dmarks system, or for short, dG/dm, where dm is not deci-metre. Now let me show how dG/dm works. Say for example I get 65 marks for a test. This means that my GPA is 3.2. However, we must remember that the highest GPA possible is 4.0. The dG/dm system takes the current GPA over the maximum GPA - thus I will get 3.2/4.0 = 80%. After which, we use this percentage to calculate the GPA again. 80% is GPA 4, and therefore I should achieve a GPA 4.

This system, however, serves to punish weaker students, which is why it might not be very good. An example would be a student scoring 40%, or 1.2. After dG/dm, he gets 30%, which is 0.8, so it is quite screwed up. I, once a student of the Lower Class, have once been in their position and I feel for them. Unless we incorporate the punishing of SLGs with this system, it should be avoided. All SLGs who fail CLE should be given an automatic 0.8 for their GPA, which would result in 0.8/4.0 = 20% = FAIL! Perhaps they should create a new grade for SLGs - 20% and below is GPA 0. That way we deprive the faguts of even getting GPA 0.8. I know this is a cruel and ruthless measure but too bad. SLGs don't deserve our pity.

Maybe this solution should only be applicable for people with GPA 2.0 and above. This way, we can't lose. It's like putting a diode so you can give out all the slaps you want but you don't get any slaps in return. Now we put a diode at GPA 2.0 so we either draw or win. This way, we will eventually win.

The second is harder to implement, because it would be a rather controversial measure. It is shifting of the GPA distribution like you would to some graph. Add a constant so everything falls into place. However, the constant must be <0. Let k = -5, then people with 65 marks would have a GPA of 3.6. Bloody simple - and I say bloody because if you do that, some bloody people are going to complain that they are still short of one mark. And then there will be bloodshed among us, which I don't think is very desirable. Thus this would not really work, for the constant will always be disputed about.

But they could always just specially shift the GPA 4 from 80% to 75%. I think that is more fair. After all, GPAs are like hurdles. Now being a former hurdler in primary school, I feel qualified to talk about this. I used to hurdle across drains and ditches on my way to school, and I plan my steps very carefully before overcoming a hurdle. Now from GPA 1.2 all the way up to GPA 3.6, the hurdles are placed at regular intervals - 5-mark intervals. Thus I can move along at a constant speed and not fear at all. But all of a sudden, the distance is increased to 10 marks when it comes to the last hurdle. Like what the hell?! The hurdler will get a shock. Not electric, but a shock nevertheless that can kill.

Imagine it's the last lap of your 2.4km, and suddenly when you're about to finish the PE teacher tells you that you have to run another round. You are already sprinting for the finish but when you hear there's another round you get deflated. And that is precisely my point. It's like springing a surprise onto you. Some might say it's not a surprise, for we are told of the GPA system long ago. Well then, even if it is not a surprise, it is a tangent phenomenon, for a tangent is not normal (stupid Writers Inc. joke).

If you're going at a constant pace, calculating the steps before you jump, how would you feel if the last hurdle was suddenly very far away? I'd feel that my rhythm is being disrupted, and that my velocity would also be disrupted. THEREFORE! I propose to let all students have the chance to keep up the pace and maintain their rhythm, and that means lowering the GPA 4 from 80% to 75%. That is the very least the school can do. It'll make many people happy, trust me - and less bloodshed as compared to having a constant in the GPA graph.

C. Build a damn Canteen and screw the Camp
I'm sure you all would have noticed this, especially since the closure of the old canteen:


For those who do not know what it is, this is supposedly the replacement canteen. But by the look of it, I think I call it a refugee camp. Just look at the number of people queuing up just to buy food? It's nothing less than crazy and refugee-like. Life is bad at the new RI Refugee Camp (RIRC), for the food sucks and the queues are long. And there are still abusers cutting queue, just to make things worse. The prefects all either run off to RJC or they stuff themselves silly with Kemama Shop supplies (ever wonder why we don't see them making much profits??) - and thus there is no law and order at the newly-built RIRC.

The worst thing is, even though it IS a refugee camp, we still have to pay for our food! Now what sort of reasoning is that!! The least they could do is subsidise payment, so at least us refugees will feel more justified. And Africans like James could go there more often to have the food. Face it, the food is lousy and it should be free. With such exorbitant prices, it only forces people to skip recess and use the money to buy and suscribe to WoW, which in turn sees CT results dropping.

And the system blames the students for bad results? I think they should really look at themselves first.

Anyway, I do think something is going to be done soon. There are signs, great big signs, that show that things might be turning for the better after all..



Yet another sign. Mingling with the students at the RIRC:



Discussions underway? I sure hope so.

In any case, the RIRC is detrimental to the school population with its bad food and sky-high prices, among which some of them are higher than my Chemistry and Physics GPA.. combined! So I hope that the school would take the time to review this problem. The effect will be 立竿见影, and at least this is something very feasible and tangible. Welfare is supposed to be improved when you restructure the RIPB and CECC but it takes years to complete. However, in building a new canteen, welfare is immediately improved, for there will be less stomachaches and more smiles on our faces as we get free food which tastes normal at the very least. Does that not improve our welfare by a lot more, rather than restructuring bloody RIPB?

I prefer efficiency and speed in seeing things done. Thus, unlike the Raffles Critics, I have decided to moot for the implementation of a new canteen. I can assure you the results will speak for itself.

And the above-mentioned three issues are all I have to propose for the school. I feel that the relevant authorities should take appropriate action - for it is imperative that life in RI should be improved. Even if they don't, I really don't care since I only have like a week or less in the school. So I'm not going to be an asshole and spam every teacher's pigeonhole giving really stupid recommendations and directing them to my website. I believe in keeping a low profile and not let myself be wholly known like Eddie Carbone or the Raffles Critics.

I hope I'm not being too critical? The school has done a great job in nurturing us into the Thinker, Leader and Pioneer; but this is the way to go if you want to improve the welfare of the Thinker, Leader and Pioneer. In short, it's called TLP. Hopefully us TLPs will experience better days ahead after my proposal is posted up here.

(Coincidentally, TLP also stands for tua lam pa =X)

Koksterclub

Here's further proof that koksterclub has lost their marbles.


www.koksterclub.blogspot.com

A day in the life of the Head Honcho

It was a bright and sunny day. I woke up and went to school, which is the place where I study, in case you didn't know. Before that, I brushed my teeth so that I would not get tooth decay. It certainly wouldn't look good for a perfect student like me. At the solemn and significant flag-raising ceremony that happens to be held everyday, I showed my unbridled patriotism for my fantastic country by singing the national anthem and saying the pledge with all my enthusiasm. I was so patriotic I had tears in my eyes.

After that, it was time for pep talk. I mean MY pep talk. "You should keep quiet when other people are talking" " You should not fidget when other people are talking" were just some of the phrases I used to teach those brats below how to be model students just like me.

In class, there was trouble. Chaos. Students were playing card games, throwing paper balls. This had to be stopped. There is no room for trivial stuff in this prestigious institution. One must always carry himself with dignity. So I stepped forward and said authoritatively," Everyone stop playing!" And to my utmost surprise, the monitor of the class replied rebelliously,"Ah F*** off" He's totally asking for it. So I booked him, but he continued playing, so I booked him again and again.... and again until my pen ran out of ink yet he kept on playing. But I was satisfied, after all he had 500 hours of detention to serve now.

Then, it was recess time. I head off to the dining hall on my own. No it's not that I don't have any friends, it's just that I enjoy my own company. There's no point in mixing with those thrash who call themselves my classmates. The food at the dining hall is absolutely fantastic, especially the spaghetti. Its taste aptly represents me.

Lessons were interesting as usual. I caught on to every word the teacher said. During the class the teacher said," If you get this question wrong you should go and hang yourself". Being the hardworking and obedient student that I was, I immediately took out a rope and offered it to the students who had got the question wrong. However, they dishonourably refused it. Five minutes later, she said "You all know I'm joking right? Don't go and hang yourself okay?" I laughed my mouth off. It was indeed a good joke.

Lunchtime. I had to meet some teachers. I always skip lunch to meet teachers. It is important to preserve a healthy relationship with them and there are so many things one can learn. Hairstyles for example. They look so mature.

3.15pm It's time to go home where I can reflect on my revolutionary achievements for the day.

Results Day Two

I found out that after yesterday's post, I took my own advice and couldn't stop smiling. Even until today, and now, I'm still grinning happily. Very happy. Ronald Macdonald apparently also followed my advice, and now he's like XD the whole day.

See? I told you if you followed my advice, you'd be a very happy person. (shown)

Anyway, I'm back here today with the continuation of results. You must learn to give and take, like how I chose to do it with my Chemistry CT. Now for Chemistry CCT I failed rather badly and GC gave me one consolation mark (by purposely marking MCQ wrongly one question). However, a month has passed and circumstances have changed. Now I've passed my Chemistry CTs with Pallet Town flying, it's time to give back to society.

I mean, I COULD AFFORD THE MARKS! TAKE IT MAN, TAKE IT! When you get back your CT and find out that you did too well to believe, then don't believe it! Give back to society! It's called 慷慨解囊 and you will be respected for that. Now I get to tell everyone that I'm a nice honest boy who doesn't kope marks secretly. Or openly. In any case I already given back to the Chemistry society what I owe, so now we're all quits. I got a feeling that Deric is going to be heavily in debt when he leaves RI. Whole day ask for marks from different departments but I never see him giving back.

In any case, I've brought something to show all of you. Overall marks!
(Don't know which idiot's hair trying to censor my marks)



And in case you can't see it, I've enlarged this part and made the words clear:
(Though the stupid hair is still there argh)



What do you do if you are in this sort of situation?
Refer to "Results Day One". Take it that you're being a nice little benevolent person who believes in giving back the school the marks you achieved by copying assignments or otherwise. If you did it honestly then just take it as CIP. I believe the more marks you give back to the school, the more CIP marks you get.

Unfortunately, our school does not practise moderation. Now I firmly believe in this, because if you moderate, it only serves to provide more trouble. You can't moderate downwards because obviously everyone is going to hate the system for it, and you can't moderate upwards because there will always be unhappy people. Example would be someone saying, "Shit la!! I actually just nice GPA 3.2, now after moderation I miss GPA 3.6 by one!!"

And then the fight continues.

Basically, all I want to say is that you shouldn't take your results too seriously. Or ask for moderation because it's time we think about giving back. When I was a poor little stupid kid with GPA less than the number of floors in the Senior Block, I had to find more bricks to build up my foundation. Now that I've got many bricks, just give back some to the Building Society (BS). They will always thank you for that.

Other than the lesson to be learnt from the results returned, I'm very pleased to announce that I've finally escaped from the clutches of poverty to join the middle-class. Haha now if I make an allocation (I still hate the word "will") I can give out more GPA points. So if you need some just message me. I'll be glad to amend my allocation. Oh by the way, the word "allocation" is not a mixture of the two words "allotrope" and "cation".

Here's a fact though: I think Chemical Energetics owns Mole Concept any day.

And I'm taking my weakest subject up to JC level. Even though I'm in the middle-class, I'll always be a 笨小孩。 Especially since I have to pay $10 for some silly rostrum. Gotta tell L Tan I 没有钱在口袋！！After all, force is perpendicular to current and if there's no current, there's no force. I'm not a current, thus she can't force me to pay up.

INSOLENCE!

It's time to tackle a pressing issue before we move on to CT results. And this issue is about our very bad bad juniors. Does it seem that every batch after ours is getting worse? I'm telling you now it not only seems that way, it is that way.

Just today after school this prefect nominee, who is in Sec 1 (I think), bumped into me. He just walked on without saying sorry. Now actually I could just let it off and not pursue the matter, but I'm thinking about my future generations in RI. I mean, if everyone was such an insolent idiot like him, what will the world be coming to? If RI's standard drops, then it will affect my job opportunities in future!! Thus, I feel no less than compelled to speak up. (Shit that sounded very Raffles Critic.)

Prefect campaigns are getting from bad to worse. I mean, I thought building walkways was bad enough, but now people are making up really stupid songs about themselves and about how they will improve the school. I'm sick of their lies!! I'm sick of their lameness!! The worst is that they are not what they seem to be. Our apparently "exemplary" juniors, aka the prefect nominees, are already so insolent. So what do you think will the rest of their batch be made of?

I know, you might say that I 断章取义，but that's my job. I'm not supposed to give everyone a chance. Not like it makes any difference anyway - because even if I hate this prefect nominee I can't tell everyone not to vote him - because voting is over and they are already tabulating the results. So what do I do? Just hope he doesn't get in.

Prefects now are like bloody light bulbs. They all want your volt (vote) so they can get more power. As you know, P = VI, so the more volts they get, the power that they possess automatically goes up. I mean, isn't it evident that the bloody power is directly proportionate to the voltage? And these faguts get their volts by proving that they have the potential to make a difference, which essentially is potential difference, which yet again = voltage. So basically the more potential they have to make a difference, the more votes they will get. That is only a natural process. But then again since the elections are basically to select the best, I guess you could call it natural selection.

So much for prefects being light bulbs. Maybe one day light bulbs will be integrated to become live beings. After all these desperate light bulbs (aka prefect nominees) keep crying out, "I need your volt, I need your volt" so much that it really gets revolting. They are so desperate, like some classmates of mine are for girls. However, as this is not a flaming blog, I am not going to list any names. If any of you are trying to electrocute me because of my implications on this blog, I'm putting a fuse right here and right now. I'm not trying to slander anyone, I'm just trying to present the facts. And it's not my fault how you interpret my posts - so there.

I think I'm sidetracking.

Conclusion? Sec 1 prefect nominees are all damn insolent. That means all juniors suck. They are all very insolent people (VIP) whom you shouldn't trust. But still, the main fault lies with Sec 1 prefect nominees - so like a spoilt fuse or bulb, you'd best go take my advice - go and change it with immediate effect. Then the current will run very smoothly around RI, and your future will automatically be brightened up. Simple as that.

(By the way, don't try to discredit my arguments by saying that there are fallacies and whatnot. I got back all my Philosophy journal entries today, and it turned out I failed nothing. So I do have some credit after all okay! Admittedly it's not GPA 4 but I'm not taking KI, and nor is it counted - so who cares.)

sick

I have been sick for the past 4 days. Im down with fever. My leg feels itchy. If things dont go well i might just be suffering from the deadly dengue and just die. So i must make it a point to settle my will just like yj has done before and arrange for my own funeral.

1. When im dead, use ALL my cash and assests to buy hell notes.
2. Take note it's ALL hell notes. Dont buy me some stupid paper house or paper aeroplane to burn for me. I can always buy them with the hell notes.

To further prove this:
Let's take it that i can exchange 100 million hell notes for 10 dollars. Exchange $10000 or more and i can get a few billion hell notes. That is enough to buy me a few houses. As compared to on earth, each paper house costs $5000 at least.

3. Burn the biggest joss sticks for me everyday. It's food actually.
4. Burn the 2nd biggest joss sticks for the King of Hades so that my path is paved. Try to bribe him if possible.
5. Burn some money for those hell guards too, so that i can have a smooth journey.I heard that are not well paid.
6. Set up a tombstone in Jurong Island. People die already of course i would want some quiet and peace right?
7. Do not pour any wine or beer on my tombstone. Vodka is preferred.
8. Always keep my tombstone clean.
9. Get the buddhist monks to perform rites for me. So that i become more powerful when i die then all the ghosts will be afraid of me.
10. If anyone of you want 4D numbers or TOTO numbers please visit me and kowtow 3 times and bring me roasted pork and say " Ah hong ah hong 4D please!". I will visit you in your dreams.

Results Day One

So you think you've had a bad CT?

Well at least now you get to know the truth!

Welcome to the Results Show at RI. Now I find this a rather controversial event - because a lot of shit does happen and it does get very emotional at times. Despite my repeated advice, it seems like no one's taking it. That advice is not to compare, because you feel (=fail?) best without comparing. I mean it!! Why bother comparing your Physics marks with James Miao when he, despite being a chemical element, can score 46/50? Without moderation, mind you. And our paper wasn't that easy.

Okay I admit, the part about the paper not being easy is only my view. =X

Still, today some people got pretty upset. Which I found was pretty much uncalled for. Why the hell should you get upset over any result? It's over, man, it's over!! If you're grieving over the failure of a subject you're not gonna take in JC, then you're dumb! Why grieve over something that is already put away neatly by you on Matriculation Day? Or if you ARE taking that subject in JC, then you're dumber!! If you suck in the subject, don't take it! Luckily they still allow you to make changes to your combination. Just send a message in to rjc@moe.edu.sg (I think) and ATTENTION MISTER TAI! I THINK I SUCK IN THIS SO I'M NOT TAKING IT!

Then poof, you'll be safe once again. Oh well. Consider it a good job done.

In any case, if you think I'm going to list down all my results here and then analyse and evaluate them, you're wrong. This is not a circus, and I'm not THAT stupid as to put down my results so as to turn this into a mockery. I mean stupid at the CT level is bad enough, but being stupid at the CT level and bringing it into a blog that has above 100 hits a day is beyond stupid. I'd get GPA 0.8 for Common Sense. So I think I'd better be wise and shut up - only going to offer some advice for those who seems to, somehow, find a reason to be unhappy despite the advice mentioned above.

If you scored full marks but didn't do bonus question, BE HAPPY!
I mean, face it, at least you had three digits in your percentage while others didn't.

If you scored GPA 4 but missed full marks by a bit, BE HAPPY!
People don't get that close.

If you missed GPA 4 by one mark, BE HAPPY!
Be happy that you did a kind deed by giving chance to the CT.

If you missed GPA 3.6 by one mark, BE HAPPY!
For it means you have 69 marks. Bloody nice number!!

If you missed GPA 3.2 by one mark, BE HAPPY!
At least you got a B overall! It's not that easy to get one, especially if you don't work!

If you missed GPA 2.8 by one mark, BE HAPPY!
At least you got a C+. There's a PLUS, meaning things can only look up. Be positive! (So that anions get attracted to you as well.)

If you missed GPA 2.4 by one mark, BE HAPPY!
You passed!! Don't be too greedy.

If you failed the test by just a little (around 45%), BE HAPPY!
Remember that the lowest in batch is usually not those who fail by a bit.

If you failed the test by a moderate percentage (around 30%), BE HAPPY!
Tell yourself you wouldn't have passed anyway - so might as well don't ask for marks.

If you failed the test by a lot (like around 20%), BE HAPPY!
You might set a record in the Guinness Book of Records. And you probably had fun doing the CTs.

If you scored zero for the test, BE HAPPY!
Because it's probably what you planned. And it takes someone VERY VERY smart to get zero - you need to know all the correct answers and fill in everything wrongly.

Unless, of course, you didn't write anything on your paper. Then you're bloody hell asking for it. And you don't deserve to be happy.

Have you ever heard of Russell Peters? "Be a man, do the right thing"?

WELL BE A MAN! TAKE YOUR CT!

Don't pon it because you have a viral infection.. the sort that makes you go cycling in the afternoon. In case you were wondering, I am not referring to anyone in particular. I'm just trying to make a lame joke that only people from 4J will understand. If you want more details, you can ask me on MSN. I'll gladly tell you more about cyclists with viral infections with their CA GPA being either 3.6 or 4.0.

Especially if it's done two times. I despise cheapos like that. Super underhand and despicable. Oh wait, maybe it should be underleg since he's a cyclist. Oh well..

Now time for some bitching! I know I said "be happy" but that is for your CTs. If your overall grade just misses the next by one mark, you are fully granted the rights to kpkb. Just as I do. I mean I'm still very happy but I have to scold THE SYSTEM here, since I obviously cannot scold our beloved teacher Chandy.

WILL THEY PLEASE REVERT BACK TO THE OLD SYSTEM! OR JUST USE AVERAGE MARK!

That's all I have to rant. I'd be 前后矛盾 if I said "be happy" and then scold a lot here. Anyway life is rather meaningless being easy-going all the time, so the occasional quirk and perk is quite all right. Now that is really all I have to say - and hopefully now all you RI people will be better-equipped to face the challenges of Results Day Two (ie tomorrow).

Remember! You will be happiest if you don't compare. If you must, then compare with me. I think I also have the ability to make you happy. For a more thrilling effect, then compare with _ _ _. Doesn't mean a guy with tutor will win a guy without one. If you are looking to get whooped in the arse, go compare with James Miao. I have confirmed and verified that all the above information is correct.

The ownage

I have three events to report today, all of which are ownage and I assure you Pokémon haters that you'll get your way this time. The ownage won't have anything to do with Pokémon.

A. Interclass Waterpolo
I was expecting to get whooped in this competition, considering how I seem to jinx my class. Think today I was a Wartortle though. However, the results were a pleasant surprise:

I 0-2 J (Group Stage)
J 4-0 L (Group Stage)
J 4-0 M (Group Stage)
D 1-3 J (Semi-finals)
J 4-3 P (Finals)

So we scored a total of seventeen goals, and I scored five of them!! Haha doesn't that make me my class's top scorer? Along with Danny the koper of course. Being a d33k gets you lots of goals. I admit I was pretty selfish and did many stupid shots. But of course I scored, otherwise I wouldn't be telling you all this.

Also must thank Yuk Lun for refereeing the semis against D. And Chen Kai for the group stage matches. The game was quite fun, with backshots and headers. Pity we can't upload any videos here, or rather I can't. Even if I can I'm lazy so I can't. It was pretty comical but I should say the final result was a rather good reflection of our efforts. We came back from 1-3 down to win 4-3.. haha sorry Daniel.

There were quite a lot of comical pictures that CZ took with his girlfriend. (Yea CZ from my class has a girlfriend - believe it or not.) However, as this is a talk-cock blog and not a picture blog, I'm afraid once again that there will be no compromise! And thus no pictures or videos. If you want them you'll have to ask CZ, because he hasn't sent me any either.

B. Prefectorial Elections
This was quite a difficult choice to make, because a certain teacher was in our class telling us to vote wisely, for it concerned our future.

!!

I think I was so scared. If I anyhow voted my future would be ruined.. and the problem was, although she had stated her stand before showing the video, I had already voted. I shaded "A", "B", wrote "S", "T", shaded "A" again, and then wrote another "I" and "N". Stupid OAS got so few letters only up to E so I had no choice but to write those words that I can't shade. Using a big blue marker.

Then on second thoughts I decided to be a good vice-captain and vote in all the Bayleyeans. So in the end I voted many candidates - which is an achievement, for in the past few years I've always saved my graphite. Oh well, since this is the last year of school, I might as well leave my legacy on this piece of paper.

If my votes even get registered amid all the traces of marker.

C. Subject Combination
Don't get me wrong - I've already submitted my form on Friday. It's just that I went to ask around today and I realised I was pretty much alone in the subject combination I chose.

I mean am I that odd or what?! No one's subject combination was identical to mine. Then as some anonymous guy puts it, "You can be alone in your class."

Wonderful. So I get to form a 1-man class in RJC. That has quite a few good points as well as bad points. Let's look at them.

Good
1. I automatically become the monitor, assistant monitor, and treasurer. If there is such a thing in RJC.
2. The class would be damn clean and I can put carpet on the floor if I please.
3. No one can copy any of my homework.
4. No one will disturb me when I do my work. No distractions.
5. I'll be top in class.
6. I get specialised attention by the teacher, so my grades will improve.
7. I get to play Gameboy Advance without any disturbance.
8. I will automatically be first-team in interclass soccer, waterpolo, etc.
9. I'll be the only lucky one if my form teacher is good. If there's such a thing.
10. I won't have anyone to suan me about my results.
11. None of my classmates will steal stuff from me (unlike now).
12. I get a lot of space to play violent basketball or violent soccer.
13. I can change my seat everyday.
14. I get to be in charge of abusing the whiteboard everyday!!
15. I won't have any bloody idiot sitting behind me.

Bad
1. I only get to embezzle my own money as treasurer.
2. I'd have to do class duty every day (wtf) - though it wouldn't be very dirty.
3. I can't copy anyone's homework.
4. I won't have anyone to talk to when I feel bored. Except myself, which is stupid.
5. I'll be bottom in class.
6. I get specialised attention by the teacher, so I can't sleep in class.
7. I'd have no one to battle or trade with (for Gameboy Advance).
8. I'll get owned in interclass soccer, waterpolo, etc.
9. I won't have anyone to bitch to if the form teacher sucks.
10. I won't have anyone to mock about their results.
11. The cleaners will steal from me since I don't have any classmates to.
12. No one to play violent basketball or violent soccer with.
13. I won't have any classmates to play pranks on.
14. If anything goes wrong in class, I'm automatically the culprit.
15. I'd have to face the same bloody idiot (ie the teacher) everyday, with no one else to look at.

Just a few pros and cons about being alone in a class. That's why I think my subject combi is a bit ownage. I never heard of any subject combi being able to differentiate me away from the rest to such an extent. Oh it also means during orientation I'd be the only one to get tekan!! Hell, I think that sucks.

Maybe I should change my subject combination when I get the chance.

And that's all the ownage I have for today. On second thoughts it isn't that ownage, but I do need a suitable title to talk about.. stuff. So yea there you have it.

Totally unrelated joke:
Which teacher is coming?
Lilian Tan. Because she 来临。

Totally unrelated 造句 (to prepare you for O levels):
翔实：那只鸟的飞翔实在很美！

Element Miao

The following element has been discovered: MIAO

Element miao has the proton number of 89. It is found in Africa. It is a rare element. It is believed that one copy of element Miao exists in Singapore.


The following physical properties of element Miao have been observed:
1. Thin
2. Bald at times
3. Extremely volatile
4. Solid at room temperature

The following chemical properties of element Miao have been observed:
1. Reacts explosively with kyap
2. Reacts violently with dcruz
3. Reacts with a certain type of krystal called kristin. Love is preferentially discharged.
4. Inert to fatigue.
5. Is used frequently as a catalyst in the waterpolo process.
6. When used in a electric cell with potassium, Miao is preferentially discharged at the cathode. Thus Miao is more reactive than potassium and is top of the reactivitiy series.
7. Is also used to catalyze the reaction between Clemonks and Wind.
8. The element will lose its catalytic properties if it takes afternoon naps. Resulting effect: An endothermic reaction will happen resulting in element Miao reaching temperatures of 38.0 degree celcius.

Today

was prefectorial elections day. As expected, I put in a blank vote. I hated the way the candidates kept pointing at us throughout the election video. There's no point pointing. Actually, it should be pretty easy to impress in the election video. Two-step approach:
1) get down on your knees
2) kowtow and beg everyone for votes
Guaranteed success, but nobody was smart enough to do that.

Tomorrow get back common test papers, I'm very nervous. I can already feel the adrenaline coursing through my blood, dilating my pupils and transferring more blood to my muscles. This is gonna be one long adrenaline walk. And of course it serves a practical purpose, which is to prepare myself for a "fight or flight" response. To fight with the teacher for marks and pass with flying colours.

My revision for O levels went smoothly, that is to say it is at level O, a level which even yj can't achieve with all his pokemon skills. So I found the time to add that little icon that you see beside the url. With luck, I'll be able to decorate the whole blog and make it nicer. Then again luck is a lady and I'm part of the nba, so don't expect anything much. Cheers.

Back to old ways

Sorry la. Recently with Ming Kiat's GBA, I've been playing Crystal like 4 hours a day, thus leaving little time for Ruby. I'd only find the time to advance one or two levels, then I'll go back to Crystal.

And the number of people asking Ruby from me have risen to nine. This is a good sign - because it simply means that there is a growing trend of people playing Pokémon!! Wahaha more people who share the same passion and desire as myself. Soon I can imagine that people will create real Pokémon - because I can see Desmond Tan with a Magnemite (and him putting loads of them through copper pipes). And perhaps Chandru with a Mankey that can use graphic calculators.

Boy, that would be bloody exciting.

But this I find very cute:


Just look at the little chicks hovering on top of the enemy Pokémon. The animation is just heavenly. And it also proves something - people who like to be surrounded by hot chicks are usually confused people! Do you really want that? So next time before you say, "I want to be surrounded by hot chicks!", I encourage you to think again. You do not want to end up hurting yourself when it is your turn to attack.

In any case, today I caught two Pokémon with interesting data.

Chinchou: CHINCHOU's two antennas are filled with cells that generate strong electricity. It contains both positive charges and negative charges. (Taken from Pokédex and Pokémon Crystal)

So Chinchou is an electrolytic cell. I wonder what happens when the reaction is complete. Maybe it'll get a new protective layer of skin, or maybe it'll just give off oxygen - who knows? I bet even the producers don't.

Magnemite: MAGNEMITE floats in the air by emitting electromagnetic waves from the units at its sides. These waves block gravity. This Pokémon becomes incapable of flight if its internal electrical supply is depleted. The sides provide strong electromagnetic attraction. (Taken from Pokédex and Pokémon Crystal)

Luckily Pokémon didn't exist while Isaac Newton did - otherwise he might have never discovered gravity due to the silly Magnemites screwing up the system. I think this should be included in the Physics curriculum for Electromagnetic Waves - my Physics grades might shoot up. But I was just thinking if Magnemite's magnets were always that powerful, would it not be attracted to the magnetic North of the Earth? Remains an unsolved mystery. Anyway judging by the fact that it emits waves, it's probably a health hazard and causes cancer. So better stay away from it.

And since Magnemite has an internal electrical supply, it means it's an electric cell. Hmm. Perhaps inside every Magnemite is a Chinchou. That way they 相辅相成，and perhaps 相得益彰。Symbiosis, as some would call it. For electric cells are opposite to electrolytic cells. Opposites attract, and I bet they work with each other. So today I've just caught a couple. Maybe I'll try putting them both into Goldenrod Daycare one of these days. Though it's funny how Daycares seem to disappear in Ruby. Can't find any at all.. zz..

Oh well - just proving that Pokémon also revolves around electrical and electrolytical concepts. I'll leave you to ponder more about it. Any brilliant discoveries, mail it to talkcocksummit@yahoo.com.sg. We'd be glad to hear from you. Other than that I think I'll go play some more.

In search of brilliance

Nowadays it's damn hard to find geniuses. I mean if you thought that people in the past were stupid, I don't know what to say about people now.

You wouldn't imagine that there were so many clever people in the past, would you? I mean scientists like Fleming, Bohr, Rutherford, the other Fleming, the guy who put his kite in the rain - Franklin (I think), Nobel, Newton, etc. The list just goes on forever.

But is there really so many clever people in the past? How come now all 销声匿迹？Unbelievable.

Lenz's Law states that the direction of induced current will oppose the magnetic motion. Now don't come and argue with me about this fact, because I know there's a 99.9% chance I'll get it wrong, since my Physics notes are probably now in the rubbish incinerator, incidentally having the acronym RI. I just know it's something opposing another thing.

Le Chatelier's Principle of Equilibrium states that if a change is made to the equilibrium, the reaction will counter the change by shifting towards one side. Now don't come and argue with me about this fact, because it's most certainly correct. Unless you tell me the Chemistry Dept of RI has been talking cock, then that's another matter.

Anyway, do you see the similarities? It makes me suspect that Lenz and Le Chatelier are actually one person! I mean, just look at the theories - they are pretty much the same. Maybe last time this guy, probably named Lenz Le Chatelier, was a damn smart bastard. He went RI and got GPA 4 for both Physics and Chemistry. And then became a great physio-chemist, or a great chemo-physicist! And then came up with Physical and Chemical theories!

So that's it. I've solved the mystery.

However, who is this Lenz Le Chatelier? I've tried searching the Net for him but he turns out to be very elusive.

First, I spotted this guy:


But he doesn't seem very smart to me. Not your sort of chemo-physicist. In fact, I think he was the guy who taught me that "it's all a matter of perspective" with his theory of relativity. Maybe with his theory, he could prove that everyone is actually everyone else's relative. That is if he is bothered to study Biology as well, and trace back the DNA, the roots of every human. Hmm. Then we'll all be related and everyone will be everyone's relative. That sounds quite cool, doesn't it? But I don't want to be Jin's relative. Ughh~! =X

Then, I found this fagut:


Who actually thought that facial hair could emit light. When he found out later that tungsten was slightly better at doing the job. I admire his candour, whatever that word means. I just like the way he does things. Next time I'll try finding a cure for cancer using my hair, or my fingernails. You never know how some things can turn out. Then I'll be world-famous. Not bad.

Finally, after a long period of time, I've found the truth about Lenz Le Chatelier.

He comes in this form:


Surprised?

And he is now suspected of teaching Maths in RI (why is he so bloody good in everything?!). Not the rubbish incinerator, but in the retard institution.

I think I've finally cracked the mystery of Lenz Le Chatelier, and I think I've found true brilliance.

One day I'm aspiring to be a physio-chemist. After I've developed my music potential, of course.

(By the way, here is our very first link ever! It is a song designed to improve your Chemistry, so please do take the time to go visit the site. We'll be putting it in our links at the side as soon as we have the time. Or actually, when I have the time. I don't think they bother. So here you go: The Elements)

Love is Blind

The Outing

I'm just here to tell you a true story about myself. You can say that I'm a loser and all, but what I hope is that you'll learn a lesson from the story. After all, life is about making mistakes and then learning from it. If you're smart, you make others make mistakes for you. Unfortunately I'm very stupid, so I make the mistakes for others to learn from it. But I'm very noble and selfless, which is why I'm sharing with you the tale.

It was a bright and sunny Saturday afternoon - meaning today. And I, being very bored, decided to go to town. Toa Payoh Town, that is. Don't you know that I never go to Orchard? Of course you might be reminded that I have an earlier post which mentioned that I went to Orchard, but that was for the pure purpose of visiting my teacher in hospital. If you don't believe me, you can go ask any of my classmates. After which I went straight home - so there wasn't any time to really be cool and hang about.

In any case, I reached Toa Payoh Town within five minutes. It was freaking crowded, for a Saturday afternoon. That bloody place is always overcrowded anyway. Plus after interclass soccer my whole body was still aching so I was limping all over the place like some German sergeant in a trench with a bullet in each leg. Okay that was lame.

I first went up to Popular to search for a book to buy. The holidays seem too long to do nothing, so I decided to pick up the good habit of reading. I went under the section of "Health" but the only titles there were stuff like "Supersex", "Ultrasex", "How To Have Good Sex", "Sex for Dummies", etc. By the way I'M NOT KIDDING!! Go check out Toa Payoh Popular if you don't believe me. I was like wtf I'm sure this is going to improve my health! Plus, the government nowadays are condemning underage sex, or sex in general since AIDS and BIRD FLU seems to be rampant.

Then they say they want more babies. I think it's 前后矛盾。

Back to the point, stupid Popular is not only not curbing the problem, they are making it worse. What's worse was that there was a little kid around the age of eight or nine picking one of those books to read -_-" so will someone please answer the question of what is society coming to nowadays? I was so disgusted I moved on to the next section - "Non-Fiction".

After checking out the range of titles they had I think that I'd seriously go read "Chemistry Matters" or "Physics Insights" by some Tan Yin Toon or Loo Wan Yong or maybe even Leong Kok Weng. What the hell, why do you need to learn how to scale mountains when all Singapore have is hills? You go sub dy/dx = 0 into the Singapore equation and you'll find that the maximum point you get would be y = 164 metres, and that's your freaking Bukit Timah hill. I'm sure I need oxygen tanks to climb that. Or determination. Or anything that even requires guts. Tsk!

The "Languages" section was much better - because if there were faults to point out I couldn't understand them. So anyway I decided to buy a few books - one on Italian, one on Spanish, one on Portuguese and one more for Russian. After all since it's the holidays I might as well learn more languages in case someone decides to kidnap me and transport me overseas. That way at least I won't have communication problems when I go overseas. Heard kidnap-and-run cases are common now, so this is the least I could do. Other than gaining weight, of course. Don't you know people like haram are hard to kidnap? There are some people so fat that you can't even fit them into your car if you wanted to kidnap them.

Oh wait, those people that big probably aren't kids anymore. And don't look at me because I'm not implying anything.

So I lined up at the queue with my four books. The queue was damn long as usual - so I pondered cutting queue. After all there was no one with blue forms and black shoes, but I think if I cut queue in front of this muscular man instead of having black ink on blue forms I'd have blue-black on my eye. No choice but to line up nicely.

The muscular man, however, turned out to be quite a bastard. He was trying to flirt, no wait, he was flirting with the cashier at the counter, trying to ask which membership/credit cards had discounts (and obviously trying to free frag some discounts for himself by 强词夺理). Now it's bad enough he's flirting but it's even worse he's flirting when I'm trying to buy books! I personally don't give a damn if he wants to do it in the middle of nowhere but this is Popular and Popular is somewhere. However, this turned out to be a blessing in disguise. I was seriously about to punch that fagut in the face but I thought I should get my wallet out first, so if he tried anything funny I could book him.

Then the surprise came. I had NO MONEY IN MY WALLET!

Tmd, no notes, nothing. Only two booking forms and two receipts for bubble tea. I had some coins but do you think I'd have enough to pay for four books? This is a lesson to be learnt - always check your wallet before you come out. I had to walk out of the queue and put back all the books. Which earned me quite a few stares. At that moment I felt damn stupid. Even more stupid than giving out M1 bags during Matriculation Day at RJC. I mean, it's RJC and they're giving out silly M1 goodie bags? Similarly here it's Popular and I'm giving out coins to the cashier. Super gay.

I put the books back. Which meant that I came all the way from my house to Popular to buy nothing? That was stupid. I just had to buy something - so I bought an eraser for thirty cents. Ah, at least it wasn't a wasted trip. Because from what I know I think the trips cost more money than the stuff I bought. Just wonderful, don't you think?

So just for the sake of wasting time, I walked into NTUC, feeling like a 笨小孩，and true enough as depicted in the song, I was like 没有钱在口袋。Also used up thirty cents, which meant that I had like fifty cents left. NTUC wasn't that bad - they had some promotions going on and there was free Milo, free Koko Krunch, free Campbell soup and many others! Unfortunately I couldn't try any because I didn't bring any tissue paper, and when I drink I tend to drag it along my face before putting whatever liquid it is into my mouth. Thus as you can see I'll need lots of tissue paper if I were to drink any sort of liquid.

However, NTUC practises double standards. I also saw promoters for Brand's Essence and Yomeishu but where were the free samples!! I tried asking them for some but all they gave me was a cold stare. Baskit, I understand their need to cut costs but I don't understand their bad service. They could give a crossword for us to complete and if we did it correctly, then we would be entitled to a free sample. Now isn't that so much better, rather than seeming so unapproachable and unfriendly? They could always make the crossword bloody difficult, and indirectly tell the public "no drinks for you". But they don't, so it's their fault that they seem so unfriendly. Poor service, too.

On the other hand, I can't see why their lucky draws are so freaking easy. If you would look carefully, the answers of their lucky draws usually can be found on the same paper where you submit your answer, which is just plain dumb. I think NTUC and the school have got it all mixed up. The school should be giving us the NTUC lucky draw type questions, so we can all get our GPA 4s and be happy. On the other hand, NTUC should place differentiation problems in their lucky draws, so only I can get it along with the China scholars. This way, we're all happy. SO WHAT IS WRONG WITH THE SYSTEM!!

Talk about System (12), I am reminded of the 4D queue at NTUC. Don't know why so bloody long, and I noticed that more than half the people in the queue were females. Huh.. then what's the issue about male gamblers gambling all their money away and causing family rifts? The queue was from inside the shop all the way outside the shop, and I can count the number of people. The ratio of males to females was 14:17, where one unit stood for about three people. I think these people are like me, too free so they come out to queue. However, they are more stupid because I come with thirty cents and go back with at least an eraser but these people come with ten dollars or so and go back with a silly piece of paper which they'll eventually crush.

So I think I'm not that stupid after all. 无庸置疑。

Then that was it, so I took a bus back home. When I boarded the bus, the reader read "Transfer". Hahaha! Another lesson to be learnt - if you want to be bo liao, at least have precise timing. Think I spent just under an hour at Popular and at NTUC, so I still got to abuse the bus system. Only paid thirty-five cents instead of forty-five cents, which means if I do it three times I'd get to buy another eraser!!

Wonderful, I say.

Life is all about going out and abusing whatever systems you can. But please do remember to bring sufficient money, or you might have to end up queuing twice. And as time is money, this means that you get to waste more money in queuing. Also, you shouldn't spend too much time at one place, just like you shouldn't spend too much money on something (like a bloody rostrum -_-). I didn't spend a lot of time at Central, and as a result saved money on the bus ride. Sometimes money, like time, just have to be spent. But if you do, spend it wisely - on stuff like erasers.

Okay I think I'll stop wasting money talking cock and go do something more meaningful. Just remember that systems are meant to be abused and samples should be given out regardless of what the product is.

Criticize Raffles Critics

We criticise rafflescritics, that makes us rafflescriticcritics, which means we're like protecting Raffles. We should give out flyers and hold forum sessions right beside theirs. But seeing the turnout (what turnout?) for their 'forum', it was more like one of the many private conversations that happen all the time. Well that's too bad.

Now on to their actual blog. Their current hot issue is the prefectorial elections, now let's take a look at some posts.
{RC is against casting of blank votes in this elections. We urge everyone to vote, with your precious votes, for a select bunch of nominees who are of high quality to register a strong support for those who are deserving.}

And they miss the point that almost everyone in the school population knows except them. Into the RIPB goes 'high-quality' candidates. And the RIPB turns them into zombies. In the end, nobody initiates anything. So the bottom line is that the RIPB is useless. That's why smart people will not bother to vote. We consider it a waste of graphite.

{RC's aims:
1. provide an avenue for feedback
2. provide a platform for free speech
3. formulate proposals with popular consensus
4. champion student welfare and rights
5. advocate active studentship
in an open and transparent manner.}

MY GOD! That sounds almost exactly like the RIPB. BIG BIG IRONIES! My fellow sec4s, in the event that you are intending to run for council next year, the above is a speech tailor-made for you. Imagine yourself reading out all the aims above on a podium to thunderous applause!

Now on to the blog layout. They've PEPpered it with quotes from famous people, and I consider that totally unoriginal. Fame and originality are of paramount importance to us. The only people we acknowledge as famous at TCS are ourselves.

I quote from RC which quotes from Martin Luther King Jr(spot the irony):" "The time is always right to do what is right." Ya, I agree totally. RC, here's 2 things you can do.
1) Shut down the blog
2)Pay protection money
or get overrun by RCC

Ironically(yet again), I'm giving their website free publicity here, but that's alright, I'm a nice guy. Maybe this will spawn more rafflescriticscritics.

DEFEND THE GOOD NAME OF RAFFLES. Be part of rafflescriticscritics today.
Ahh ironies! I think I'm turning into Ironman.

Insights

Firstly, I think yj should try for MEP just to make a point. And audition with the recorder. After all, it IS a musical instrument. It will make the Integrals proud.

Anyway yj already invented a new game called violent basketball. It involves bouncing the ball as high as his head and then preventing people from koping it by being, well, violent. In fact, this game can be played together with normal basketball. Inventing Games grade: A+++

Had a nice long session of talking cock with CZ, that 卖零食的胖子。And he was lame, in both senses of the word. Example: Who studies farmers? Ans: Pharmacists.

Turns out he's a bookie as well and he offered bets on certain scandalous things, but with yj's 前车之鉴, i decided not to.

Anyway my dai dee record today stands at 100% win, 2 out of 2. I challenge you noobs to come and beat me. Hearts also can. My record for shooting the moon stands at 3 consecutive times.

A_dreXiao is appealing for people to take H2 eng lit with him, so if you are downright ugly and a total idiot to boot, do go and take lit. You'll find a friend there.

I think the graduation gift shouldn't be something that is absolutely essential and that the school should provide in the first place. Based on this logic, a water cooler or a rostrum are the worst things to get. I have a fantastic idea and that is a compensation package for _________ so that _________ can leave us and future generations alone. I'm very sure that will leave a legacy as the first batch to give such a wonderful present.

Raffles Ahoy!!

Today was another exciting day for the no-life.

CCA Grading
We all went to the AHH to receive our CCA grading. If you notice carefully, it's like a Maths Pop Quiz, because it's actually upon 10. I, being an active Rafflesian, decided to contribute more and do the bonus question. So, having 10+ marks, I naturally got an A1 for CCA. After all, I can say that I was in the waterpolo team for three consecutive years in RI, which only people in the likes of Chen Kai, James and Sherwin can boast about. I admit I free fragged that. But I still got 10+ points so in terms of CCA I get my GPA 4.

YES!!

Batch Gift
L Tan was holding a discussion on what the batch should buy for the school. Now I don't mean to be critical like our fellow Raffles Critics but sometimes I feel that I should at least give my twenty cents' worth. I don't have ten dollars to freaking pay for a batch gift, but I do have twenty cents - so will you all please listen up.

Rostrum is stupid because you could always reuse the old one. It is only extravagant to spend so much money on another. True, it's a new auditorium and everything should be new - but getting everyone to pay $10 is a communist act, which we should not indulge in. Leave that to Hwa Chong, okay? In any case if you wanted a great rostrum we always have Tumnus Huang Lu of 4J to do the carpentery, and if you want I can go help out as well. Anyway the earth is dying and we should save as much wood as possible. It is only ironic that L Tan, being a Biology teacher, does not know about this fact and does not wish to recycle. Sad indeed.

Jamming set is stupid because who the hell is going to use it. Our school has no good jammers that can properly use a guitar. I'm not saying I'm good, I'm only implying. You don't need a guitar or drums to make a jamming set - and thus $4780 would definitely be too much for a freaking jamming set. I could get the school a jamming set for only $10, and I'm not kidding. It's a matter of perspective and it's a matter of how you want things to be done.

Toilet bowl is stupid because we are Batch of 2005, not Lee Yang Kevin Mark. Though I admit that guy has bravery. But we don't want to be brave, we want to leave a legacy. Or at least that's what they intend.

Pool table is stupid because of the number of abusers in RI. We had a table soccer machine donated, and look at the state it is now. Perhaps it would be wiser to donate a POOL, because that would benefit us the most. (RJC doesn't have a bloody pool). Pool table only serves to increase violence in the school (pool table fights, more people cutting CUES and when there's pool tables there's always beer). Although beer can improve your Chemistry - it's an alcohol - but some things are better learnt in theory than in practical. Pool table only invites future generations of Rafflesians to fight and fight. Eh.. actually I don't mind. Not my business anyway.

Piano is stupid because it's pointless having one in the auditorium. Don't know what they talk about Baby Grand, Upright Grand, but I do bloody hell know a piano is gonna cost us More Than Four Grand. And that's a grand expenditure, something which requires so much money that supporting grandparents could be much easier. Anyway if you're really good you don't need a good piano to make good music. So stop wasting so much money. I think it also damages the environment and we should really think more about it.

Underwear is stupid because you can't see it. One of the GEPs actually suggested it -_- and that only reflects badly on their stream. What the hell, Raffles Underwear? Come to think of it, it might not be that bad after all. Since we have Raffles trunks.. err.. -_-

You know what I suggest we buy as a batch gift? NOTHING!

The school has my utmost respect for nurturing me to be a Thinker (think how to get GPA 4), Leader (leading in singing "Semoga Bahagia") and Pioneer (that solid brand of electronics is damn good quality). But that is all they will get. After all, the Chinese say 礼轻情义重，it's the thought that counts. What is tangible isn't as much as what is intangible. My respect for the school would be more than anything I can give - and that's that.

Lion Dance
Damn good la they all. I'm considering joining the troupe when I go RJC.

Matriculation Day
Before I start, let me tell you something: There are many reasons for Q&A and seeking attention is not one of them. Stupid Solomon Sia, as usual, was asking stupid questions. If you could still remember a question he asked PE Dept the other time - "What is the nutritional value of a sperm?" - you would know what sort of a person is he. I mean, how stupid is that. Will those stupid faguts from PE Dept even know what you're talking about? It's a valid question, but it's better to ask Bio teachers.

Right, back to the talk. It was pretty useless, to put it nicely.

Q&A was worse because of the quality of the questions asked. To be fair, some of them were valid but I present to you the very best of RI faguts.

Wei Lip - Firstly, I have two questions to ask. Firstly, I think THE TIME HAS COME for RJC to show us a CONCRETE LIST of universities acknowledging KI. Is there also CONCRETE EVIDENCE that H3 will benefit us, like our seniors did S paper?

Man, I really don't know what the GEPs are thinking. Sure, the question was valid, but he could review his grammar and phrase it in a nicer way. I'm not kidding - this is really what he said, even though not word-for-word. Bloody hell, Hodge was pretty kind to him. I would have replied, "I can't give you concrete evidence because I'm not a cement mixer and my Chemistry GPA is only 2.4 anyway. Plus, I think the only thing that's concrete around is your head."

So much for being transparent about the system. If you give concrete, then it would be opaque. Thus it is really quite pointless for RP to go on if you keep wanting concrete evidence. Anyway at least that was a valid question. The next one isn't, nor the one after.

Adnaan - What is Raffles Rock? Is it some geology thing?

As if a rocker like him doesn't know. Anyway Raffles Rock was more like Raffles Cock, because if you see their band.. it's really like some joke club. We shall not pursue this - let us move on to the last question. Save the best for last, innit?

Solomon Sia aka King of Q&A - In light of the aging population, are we compelled in RJC to have boy-girl relationships?

I couldn't believe what I was hearing and in fact, neither could the batch. When he finished the first part of the sentence people were already making a hell lot of noise. Now as part of the NBA I find that very unacceptable behaviour. He comes to RJC to study or to buaya? The reason why we take such a strong stand against buayas is because we find their behaviour in schools "unnatural", and their thoughts "inexplicable" and "dirty". They pollute the school community and destroys the balance of nature, because as students our first nature is to study, so why the hell do you buaya?

Anyway, I don't see the point here. I think I'm ugly and I think Solomon is worse than me. And I think his question was just for attention, and well he did get it. I hope he's happy now. BGR and aging population indeed.. let me ask you this: If you have a girlfriend, will that prevent you from aging? Will it prevent you from growing older? The answer is, of course, no. Thus I really don't see the importance of this question.

It's really just plain stupidity. Coming from someone of supposedly a higher intellect. Tsk. I think we expressos can whack those GEP cappucinos one day.

Walking Around
Today proved quite a fruitful day - or rather a goodieful day, because I collected only around four goodie bags. It proved tricky to beat the system but nothing is impossible. Now I have food to last me the next week and hurray for that! No need to buy snacks from CZ the snack man. Happy already. Plus I had a few bottles of Newater the Reverse Osmosis water to test out in my lab at home. Hurray for that as well.

We also did try the crossword from Writers Inc. Baskit it wasn't easy, but at any rate easier than bloody Chemistry Aspartamé Quiz. Because I almost scored full marks for it. All you need is an inquiring mind as well as a mathematical mind. Yet again we abused the system and got a lot of chocolate. Now this is what I like. Only thing I could hope for was that it should really be graded, and be part of my CA grade. Then maybe my English CA would be pushed up to GPA 4. Ahh.. how wonderful that would be.

Didn't really get a chance to see the academic booths. I've submitted the forms already, and it's not like I'll get Interest marks for walking around. Do you know that Chinese Dept awards Interest marks if you show an interest in the language? What's more, it's added to your CA so that's certainly a plus point. After walking around a bit in RJC, I realised no teachers were watching and I realised I wasn't going to get any bonus marks for Interest in my CA. Thus I left before eleven.

Back In School
Violent basketball where my team won 15-12.

Interclass Soccer
I think you can tell that the standard of interclass soccer is getting lower every year. YH, what happened to 4F and the china mama team!!!!!!!!!

After It All
Being a no-life, I just went home to sleep. End of another interesting day at school.

And as those RJC people would say, Raffles Ahoy! Proudly brought to you by the 25th Student's Council, and I can tell from the RI people's looks that almost 60% of them want to be part of the 26th. What's more the Chairman and the Vice-Chairman of the SC this year were both FEMALES! So actually they aren't really chairmen but chairwomen. Don't know why they cannot even get their names right.. unless they are trans, of course, like a certain teacher in RI. But let's not talk too much about that.

The implications of a female being Chairman of the SC means that Tim Chow might not necessarily be Head next year. Senthil so power yet cannot even be Vice-Chairman. I can sense a revolution next year - but of course it's all up to you, for we as Talk Cock Summit can only continue to talk cock here.

And as our part-time job, try to get GPA 4.

Matriculation Day

Tomorrow is the much-awaited Matriculation Day. Where you go to decide your future. Heard we have lion dances and a welcoming committee. Plus there will be buskers (Integrals's future competitiors!! - and losers) and some silly MEP thing going on in RJC.

Wow, I think I am so excited.

In case you needed some help with choosing subject combination, here's a rough guide:

All-rounder
H1 Physics
H1 Maths
H1 Chemistry
H1 Biology
H1 Geography
H1 Literature
H1 History
H1 Chinese
H1 GP
H1 PW

Kiasu all-rounder
Same as above + H1 Economics + H1 Theatre Studies

Witch Doctor
H2 KI
H2 Chemistry
H2 Physics
H2 Biology
H2 Mathematics
H1 PW

(This is abusing and cheating, for actually there are no Arts subjects. Then again, that's what being a Witch Doctor is about.)

Faggot
H2 KI
H3 Physics
H3 Biology
H2 Literature
H1 PW

(Another way to abuse the system. Notice that it still follows all the laws.)

Like I said it's a rough guide, and because it's real late, I am sorry but I am unable to provide you additional information. Just go and matriculate and enjoy the music they provide. Though the sad truth is that The Integrals are probably ten times as good and we won't be performing. Okay that's Poisoning The Well - I'm not giving RJC MEP a chance. Tsk.

Today I won the athletics championships in inter-class soccer. I played every minute of every match, and from being a statue at the back, I turned into a moving statue at the front. After a while, I decided to do X-country at the RI field. I guess our class did fine. Scored zero, conceded seven. As I played the most, it was most certainly my fault. I'm sorry, I let you all down.

I was in many tense situations today. Though I didn't take any pictures, here's an accurate representation of what happened.



I'm mostly the guy at the back, chasing, shoving and sliding. What's more it rained a lot so I became a mudskipper - in the terms of the eccentric Hongkie. In the terms of Pokémon Ruby, I think I became a Mudkip.

In any case, I'm very tired now and don't feel inclined to say anymore. By the way, I've received seven requests on MSN for Pokémon Ruby and the Visual Boy Advance emulator. I'd like to say keep up the good work! - because finally people now are learning how to enjoy their lives to the fullest. By playing Pokémon, your life will certainly be improved. Regrettably, VBA cannot be sent through MSN and therefore to stop you irritating faggots from bugging me, I'm giving you the site to download VBA, which is: http://baixaki.ig.com.br/site/detail6943.htm

So next time you come to ask me for the emulator, just go to this site. Guaranteed success.

And if you still want Pokémon Ruby, no problem. Only thing the file is quite big so you might like to play Pokémon Crystal while waiting. Or go research on what starting Pokémon you should choose because I won't entertain any questions after that. I'm seemingly turning into the resident Pokémon expert, or a Pokémaniac, which I must clarify I am not, because I don't study Pokémon. I just play and enjoy it.

Just like I do to Mathematics.

In a nutshell, just enjoy your Pokémon and your matriculation tomorrow.

(By the way, thanks Ming Kiat for lending me GBA! Hell, it feels great playing Pokémon on Gameboy again.)

Plain Unlucky

As yh has mentioned, today was inter-class soccer, and my class was plain unlucky. In each of the three matches we played, there were only three possibilities, loss draw or win, meaning that by the rules of probability we had 33 1/3 % chance of winning. Yet we couldn't clinch this percentage in each of our games. How unlucky.

Adding to that, Kok weijie, our 'hero', cramped a record four times, more than once per match, so much so that all of us became experts at relieving cramps. And the last time he cramped, we were so sian of stretching his legs that we just let him lie on the ground and listen to him moan and groan.

On a more serious note, Yi Ming threw the ball at Kenneth Kong's head during a throw-in. His reason? Kenneth was blocking him. What a psycho. I think Ho Sheng should play soccer with Yi Meng. Then Yi Meng will teach him the rules of the game.

World Peace!

Ho Sheng

First let me tell you about a blog or rather an organisation called Raffles Critics. They are a group of people or rather two if im not wrong that are truly concerned about the welfare of Rafflesians. I quote Raffles Critics,"RafflesCritics is an external body run by students of Raffles Institution to unite fellow RI boys, encouraging students to be more involved in the future of the institution."

Sounds good right? Someone who will finally speak up for the school for all the injustice and someone daring to critisize the school admin.

Today was actually inter class soccer. I do not really like to critisize people but i felt that today Ho Sheng was really being a d33k. The situation was the Aik Kwan and James Cai was challenging for the ball and James came out worse and was down with quite a serious knock/cramp whatever.

That's not all. Mr. Raffles Critic walked up all the way from his goalkeeper posts and gave Aik Kwan a kick in the ass. After walking away Cunzhi said to him " Eh want to fight arh?" Brave, ferocious Ho Sheng replied with a FUCKYOU and a middle finger. Now let us analyse why he did that.

Firstly he is Mr. Raffles Critic. Of course he was highly critical of Aik Kwan so naturally that justify him to give Aik Kwan a kick.

Secondly, let us talk about whether Aik Kwan had the intention to foul James or not. From what i saw it was a 50-50 challenge. If that is the case then why do you give a damn kick to Aik Kwan when firstly it's not even you that got injured and secondly he didnt even have the bloody intention.

Now if Aik Kwan had the intention to do something malicious to James Cai, does that justify you stupid brain to give him a kick? Please use your highly critical brain and think. What bloody reasons do you have? Anger? HAH what a loser. You should know better to vent your fustrations on the field. Not as if you are not a hockey school team player. Do you go around using the stick to hit the opponents or the referee when things dont go your way? Others i'm quite sure they wont but for you i dont really think so.

I have seen worse. People getting studded or stepped on and they dont even complain. People like Cunzhi who plays at club level dont even complain when people push him off the ground. Btw his studs were ripped off from his shoes today from soccer. I dont see him complain. Stupid d33k has to go all the way to give someone a kick when it doesnt even concern you.

As i said if you happen to read this blog please come to my class and give me a kick in the ass. I would love that. Every generation has its own Chee Soon Juan and I would love to have the honour of you kicking me because i know someone stupid like you will sure do something idiotic in the future.

PS; i mean to malicious intent at raffles critic. All offensive remarks are solely directed at Ho Sheng that d33k.