七步答

Prosecutor:
煮豆豆烧焦，
要吃吞不了。
虽是同根生，
但太狼藉了。

It was a pity I couldn't attend the court session. I was busy trying to figure out how to get to RJC next year, because at this rate I think I'll fail my Philo. My CLE should scrape through because even though my behaviour ranges from very bad to atrocious, they say I do have leadership capability after all. I think they also don't want me to stay in RI one more year, because I'll just create trouble for another. Then their electric bill, water bill and pay packets to teachers will have to go up. Too bad. So maybe they'll let me pass CLE for that.

As for RE, I think we should pass as well. Rome was not built in a day, our RE was. At least Commander Eng from our Sec 1 camp will be a very happy person. Because our RE group showed the tenacity of working one full day at our project. It so embodies Eng's shouting of "WHERE'S YOUR SENSE OF URGENCY!" See? There you have it, our one-day RE project. We should pass because we showed unity in difficult times. That's what really gets you the extra mile, or in this case, the extra 200m because I don't think RJC is one mile away from RI. That would suck.

However, when it comes to Philo, I think it's a different story. I failed my Marxism essay (it's still under Archives) and I've no freaking idea why. Did I not do a comprehensive enough analysis? I just sit here for two hours and wonder what went wrong. After a while (meaning two hours and five minutes), I suddenly realised I might have been a little too offensive. And maybe I did say one or two things that I shouldn't have, such as sleeping in class. But still failing me?! Sigh, I think I might have to suffer next year with Zhizhi's batch. And a new asshole in charge of RIPB by the name of Chua Jun Yang.

!!!

Oh wait!! Prometheum Day isn't here yet. How come I know?

According to journalist Santokh Singh, who tokh-ed a tremendous amount of cock at the Careers Forum, you don't have to know - we have our sources. So maybe we should just go march in and interview Paul Lim aka the Big Boss. Kaiyang's the Boss so I suppose Paul has to be larger than him, hence the name Big Boss. Then when Paul Lim goes huh.. we'll do it the TNP way and say "doesn't matter.. because we have our sources." We are, after all, The New Paper of RI. Just that we tend not to operate on paper to save printing costs and actually we gossip quite a lot. Like some tabloid. Like The New Paper.

Anyway we'll take bets on who will become the next HP and we'll be glad to accept bets through MSN or if you want you can also send to talkcocksummit@yahoo.com.sg (the former preferred). If your candidate is not in the list, don't worry. You just name him and we'll give you the odds.

Here are our choices so far:
David Lu 3-1 (hot favourite!!)
Aaron Chee 5-1 (another hot favourite!!)
Anwaar 8-1 (dark horse - don't underestimate)
Naing Yelin 8-1
Walter Wong 8-1
Loh Zhizhi 10-1
Eugene Neo 999999999999999999-1 (that fa-gut)

Place your bets early maybe we'll give you better odds.

That's it for now. Before I leave you might want to hear some prefect jokes.

In the army, the prefects are mighty fine!

Aaron Chee: Recruit, come over here!
David Lu: Yes, sir!
Aaron Chee: Recruit, what's your name?
David Lu: Lu, sir! (loser..)
Aaron Chee: What?! Are you trying to be funny?
David Lu: No, sir!
Aaron Chee: Sir what sir! I no name is it!
David Lu: No, Sergeant Chee!
Aaron Chee: That's better. I need to check on the other recruits now! Make sure you stay on duty!
David Lu: Yes, Sergeant Chee!
Aaron Chee: Okay. I'm leaving now.
David Lu: Sergeant Chee, bye!