Things I Avoid Doing

I'm currently in a very reflective mood now. Which is to say I'm not doing anything. Homework undone, a messy desk, and I'm sitting on my ass, looking intently at the clock as it goes 'tick tock tick tock'. The seconds of my life frittering away. 'tick', 1 second closer to dying. 'tock' another second.

But boy do I feel good. There's a certain sense of satisfaction in not doing anything and simply lazing around. Knowing that your contribution to society is absolutely 0. And that you're actually enjoying yourself. I let out a loud yawn.

And I went to the fridge to look for the ministry of enjoyment. I took out 6 cans and arranged them in the shape of a flower with 5 petals, like they did in an advertisement a long way back. "For those who love me" I said aloud, taking one 'petal' away. And then I (what else?) drank it in one gulp. This was followed by "For those who love me not" and guess what, I drank that as well. And another. And another. Until all the petals were gone. The last can was "for those who love me not" and quite frankly, I couldn't think of anyone who didn't love me, so I threw the can out of the window.

I think I heard a 'thud'. I think. But then again it shouldn't have anything to do with the ambulance sirens I heard 15 minutes later or the article in the papers the next day saying someone had been killed by a can of Coke. Well at least he was enjoying coca-cola.

Anyway, I went online. And it wasn't to do work or help me concentrate or whatever. Everyone knows that multitasking is just a self-deception. Ok so I went bloghopping, hop, hop, hop, and all I got out of that was a gazillion-degree increase in myopia, astigmatism and long-sightedness all at the same time. I would like to ask the question of why most people only use 20% of the webpage for words, making them so tiny that I had to use a magnifying glass. No kidding. For these evil bloggers intent on destroying your readers' eyes, where is their conscience? Sigh, such inconsideration. Fortunately, there's always tcs.

And what did I do next? Oh yeah, I went to eat at MacDonald's. I was really really hungry, so I ordered a Big Mac. But I'm a vegeterian who doesn't eat meat, so I took out the burger and I ate the box. Tough huh? But it wasn't enough, so I ate the table as well. And after that the tiles on the floor. I'm lovin' it.

And then like the good boy that I was, I went home where I got scolded by my mama for eating too much. The end.