My new commitment

If you think I haven't been putting enough effort into maintaining this blog, I think you can go blame it on my new girlfriend. Okay I shouldn't have broken NGO rules, but the benefits of having this girlfriend far outweighed the cons of having her. Thus I am sorry to announce to the world that I'm no longer a member of the NGO.

My girlfriend has been keeping me busy for late nights. She keeps demanding that I stay in school looking after her welfare. So naturally more time in school means less time at home. Less time at home means less access to a damn computer. Which means I don't get a chance to yell at how much my girlfriend is abusing me. I could come up with a list about what she made me do, and here goes:

1) Making me wake up a whole FIFTEEN MINUTES earlier in the mornings so I can go see her and take care of her (like she cannot take care of herself, the *****.)

2) Making me do all her homework and reflections.

3) Making me lose my voice because I love her so much that I cheer for her like some crazy nut.

4) Making me stay back in school till late at night to ask for my opinion on which boyfriend/girlfriend of hers is the best to keep track of her finances, which person is best to take down notes for her, which person is best to manage her life, etc.

Okay from Point 4 I'm guessing you know that this is no ordinary girlfriend. Some more she's some big-time flirt cum lesbian, having like 88 partners. Uh well which kind of causes a lot of confusion but from all the crap I've been talking about, you'd be an idiot not to know what my girlfriend is called.

Her name consists of seven letters. Starts with C and ends with OUNCIL. Now if you think having such a girlfriend is easy, think again. I've had to apply to get to be her boyfriend okay. Plus I had to sit through an interview with one of her best lesbian partners and err, campaign to see if how many people thought me suitable to be her boyfriend.

So you want to be her boyfriend/girlfriend? Try harder man.

But anyway I think it's kind of depressing to talk about my girlfriend. We should move on to more stupid, cocked-up topics. After all this being a talk cock summit, we should seriously talk more cock instead of talking about what failures we are in keeping to our organisations which you see at the top of this page.

Thus I will make stupid riddles for you to guess. They are kind of related, by the way.

Q: How many RJC students does it take to change a lightbulb?

Think carefully before you answer.

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A: You can't change a lightbulb because matter cannot be created nor destroyed. And for that matter, the question is unclear. What exactly is "change"? Some say changes are constant, but lightbulbs might be variables for all you know. You cannot possibly differentiate constant lightbulbs, unless you do it implicitly. But nevertheless my point is that you don't CHANGE lightbulbs. There is no point in doing that. Just go light it up.

Next question, still on the lightbulb issue. Okay assume you've taken the lightbulb out of its place because it's fused already. You want to replace the lightbulb.

Q: How many RJC students does it take to screw in the new lightbulb?

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I won't tell you the answer yet, I'll let you consider another question. That being:

Q: How many ants does it take to screw in the new lightbulb?

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I got a feeling this is going to be damn obvious. Just let me give you a clue. Ants are strong creatures that can lift things up to 20 times their own weight. An average ant weighs 0.723 g (3 sf) while an average lightbulb weighs around 62.6 g (3 sf). Now do your Maths and tell me the answer. This is NOT a trick question.

(This is a lightbulb question.)

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The answer is two.

Now if you'd kindly go back to the RJC students question - how many RJC students does it take to screw in a new lightbulb..

Can you see THE LIGHT? Not from the lightbulb but from your brain. Keep considering the question.

Q: How many RJC students does it take to screw in the new lightbulb?
Q: How many RJC students does it take to screw in the new lightbulb?
Q: How many RJC students does it take to screw in the new lightbulb?
Q: How many RJC students does it take to screw in the new lightbulb?
Q: How many RJC students does it take to screw in the new lightbulb?

Done?

Then comes the answer.

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The answer is: UNDEFINED

Don't you think a lightbulb is too small a place for any amount of RJC students to fit in, much less to screw? If you got this right, well done. You're obviously in the MRT (ie train of thought) with YL and me. If you didn't get it right, that's okay. Thomas Edison wouldn't, either. Since he spends so much time fiddling with materials to make the filament of a lightbulb, I very much doubt he has time to ponder such crap.

So take pride if you get it wrong. You might be an Edison of modern day.

Right I hope you enjoyed that.