Happy birthday YL!

Okay.. so after having celebrated my birthday last year and YH's birthday early this year.. the time has come to celebrate YUK LUN's birthday!!

Actually, if I didn't post today, the little thick-skinned boy will also post about himself anyway hahaha. After all, he's quite famous for his shameless MSN nicks on his birthdays - I still distinctly remember two years ago it was something like the genius celebrating his birthday or what.. (maybe I remembered wrongly), but more recently a year ago, it was like "16 years ago on this day.. a very important event happened on this earth." Or something to that effect. You get the drift.

So anyway for all our faithful readers out there, you get a complete write-up on YL today. Because I am going to list a few facts about him that you probably didn't know about. Of course, I am arguably not the best person to do a description on him, because I'm not THE expert on YL. There are many other people close to him than I am. But still, being an author of TCS who is willing to divulge information on YL, you'll just have to make do with the information I give you and take it all in.

Because no one else is going to do it. =)

So YAY random facts about YL!

1) He plays Gunbound like me.
Ya you got it right, he's quite no life as well. Only now that his computer is down and he's got no Gunbound to play, he has no choice but to err.. not play. We used to be a formidable (and guai lan) team once.. playing Tag games with Bigfoot and Sate (ya okay that's a trade secret but never mind, we're nice). Err and his level is a double metal axe.. some n00b, it's even lower than mine. Okay I play much more than him and my win rate is probably lower, but like I said he doesn't play now so this information is irrelevant. He's from the guild pizzahut and I bet you didn't know that. After all, would YOU play Gunbound?

2) He's a left-hander. And his left hand is weak.
In case you didn't know, Yuk is some mad left-hander because his right hand is stronger than his left despite using his left hand for everything. Don't believe me? Try arm-wrestling him. Of course, there's this possibility that you might experience total ownage against him if you are too weak or too strong, but the neutrals suggest that his right hand is stronger. Saying which, I think he blogs with his left hand only. After all, blogging is about writing and you do writing with only one hand right? (no pun intended) Err so he blogs with only his left hand, and it being weak, gets tired out easily. Maybe that's why his posts aren't as long as mine.

3) His greatest achievement is planning a class outing.
With YL and I both screwing up our LES interviews, I feel qualified to laugh at him because he's probably laughing at me for my answers. Like when I said "I have a lot of passion for waterpolo" in one part then the next moment I said "I was sick of it" - when actually I wasn't really.. it's just that I preferred another sport. Well if you thought that was screwed up you should have heard what YL said. In response to the "What do you think is your greatest accomplishment" question, he gave a very very very funny answer. As in, nothing wrong with it, just that I wouldn't say it to my interviewers. Umm, you can go read the title if you want to know what his answer was.

4) He's a chiobu.
Contrary to popular belief that crushes are often one-way from the male species to the females, YL goes against this trend. With evidence that he is a male from his BC, he still gets tons of crushes from the opposite sex, therefore earning his nickname "chiobu". After all, as chiobus are always in demand and YL is in demand, it's only logical that he is being called a chiobu. That is if you'll ignore Mr. Kenneth Low's Logical Fallacies in Philosophy for a while. Well if I'm not wrong someone gave him a lovely purple sash as his birthday present.. with the word "CHIOBU" emblazoned right across it. Let's hope YL stays hot and chio and in demand.

5) He started Talk Cock Summit.
Now I guess I might have mentioned it many times before somehow, but now let me tell you officially - that this blog was his brainchild. Okay he has no child and whether he has a brain or not is debatable.. but you definitely must give credit to him starting TCS. It began from our Friday night talk-cock sessions, since Friday signalled the end of busy weeks in the past (now Saturdays are much more irritating) and we would like a nice long chat after a not-so-nice long training. Our topics ranged from girlfriends (which we have none duh) to class politics (like how he would bitch about Andre and how to properly handle a class), so it was rather memorable. Now we post our shit on this blog because he suggested the idea and with my being a blogger since Sec 2, the blog was born. And it's all thanks to him.

6) He uses "CB" more than I use "f***".
Overall I don't know who is more vulgar - but I must say that I hear Hokkien vulgarities out of YL more than I hear myself blurting the universal f-word. Eh but it's always interesting to note how sometimes he complements using "CB" with a prefix. Okay I think this isn't a very nice thing to notice but try talking to him one day on a topic he isn't very passionate about. Anyway these are random facts so yep, here you go.

7) He acts stupid but is actually damn smart.
Ya he'll keep complaining about how he doesn't know about chiral centres (now), meso compounds (now), latent heat (last time), equilibrium (last time), Chinese phrases (last time) and about how he didn't mug for this and that, but FINALLY when the results come out he actually just pwns your arse flat. Okay maybe not everyone, but he certainly does it for mine. Though arguably I have my days too, his probably far exceeds mine. His GPA is indicative of that of a genius, because he mugs VERY VERY little. Next time if you want him to slack with you for a test, make sure you secretly mug so you can beat him. Even though there is no guarantee that you'll win, it gives you great satisfaction to beat a genius.

8) He scores important goals for the waterpolo team.
There was that shot from the corner against the then-Chinese High (now Higher Chinese Idiots) to pull us level at 5-5 (though we lost out on goal difference, dang) and in our B division matches he did get a few crucial ones as well. YL was one of the most irritating sharpshooters in the waterpolo team, and I had a bloody hard time trying to save his shots during training. Of course, I can't very well comment about his skills now, but when I go down sometimes for shooting practice with him he shows his occasional brilliance by scoring that top-corner shot. I think other schools had better be warned about this. It's dangerous.

I was about to give 17 facts but there really isn't much time. So you might have to settle for half (like Eddie from A View From The Bridge, much-loved Lit book in Sec 4) and just take 8.5 facts.

Here is the half fact. (ie it's half fiction)

HE HAD A GIRLFRIEND ONCE.

Now it's entirely up to you how to choose to interpret this. After all 50% of something can be any 50%. Like if I give you 100 stickers, you can pick which 50 stickers you want and the other 50 to discard. Even though you might settle for half, and half and half is equal, you must understand from Animal Farm that "some animals are more equal than others".

Then as horses (or whatever animal) have calves and "calf" rhymes with "half, you can assume that animals are halves and thus some halves are more equal than others. Back to the point..

You can dissect this fact into two in different ways. I'll give you a few options of how you might choose to interpret it, but they do not necessarily represent my views. They are merely analyses. Remember, it is ONLY half a fact okay!

a) He didn't have a girlfriend, because having a girlfriend means two-way love. This meant that he liked the girl but no the girl didn't like him aww.

b) He didn't have a girlfriend, refer to above for reason. But this time it meant the girl liked him but he didn't like the poor, (probably) ugly sod. Oh well aww again.

c) From TCS's definition of girlfriend, the couple must at least admit that they are a couple for a day before it gets officially recognised. So YL and this girl were together for half a day. Then they started denying so it was really no count. Or maybe half a count at best.

Either way, settle for half or not - we have come to the end of the YL birthday special on TCS. Hope you enjoyed it and if you didn't, try settling for half. Read the top part and be happy with it. Okay I have four words of wisdom before I end off my post.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY YUK LUN!

(PS Any words said by geniuses = words of wisdom hahahaha. Damn I'm thick-skinned turning into YL soon lol)