As I sit on my bum, shaking my leg, and taking in all the words and knowledge that the Internet bestows upon me, I suddenly feel enlightened. What is it that makes an article such a piece of crap that you curse the author for wasting your time? And what makes an article so good that you'd not only want to share it via facebook, twitter, digg, stumble, reddit, you'd even print a copy out for your grandmother?
Should it be flowery and eloquent in a sophisticated way? Consider this. If you read it to the end, well done. The author's vocabulary and grammar may be way above mine, but I'm the reader, and so I judge. And I'm not impressed. Sure, there is descriptive language, 'sound of countless languages intertwining into an incomprehensible melody', but that's all. Do you feel interested in the story? Do you feel the author's sense of enlightenment? No I don't. There are descriptions, but no details. When it comes to the gist of the article, which is to say the author is inspired by her internship, she can only describe it as an 'understanding of a human element', and the 'human element' part of the phrase is taken from some commercial which I have never seen before, so that's another negative point. In addition, it's just got the 'sheltered person starts working and is inspired' kind of bullshit taste. Like some bullshit forced out of the bull's ass because a university application asked for an essay about a life-changing experience. Poor bull. Article fail.
Contrast that with this. Although such a long article, it is simply interesting, with an array of examples and personal experiences, and it makes sense too! I wish I could write like that.
The last example that I have is also the best. It's nowhere near as long as the previous two, and it simply proves that writing is also about putting the heart and soul into words. It comes from the best of Craigslist, which is an online bulletin board wildly popular overseas, but not so popular in Singapore. It also happens to be a time warp for me, because everytime I exit the site, I wonder where all my time has gone. Well at least there was this . Enjoy and don't cry.
It appears that there are really a lot of ways to write an excellent essay. You just need to ask an extra question of 'How do I make this interesting?' Unfortunately, years of writing badass General Paper essays has sucked the soul out of writers in Singapore. I mean, we even have to pay people to read. And mark them. Fortunately, most of the people will end up drafting badass government policies or writing legal documents that should not intriguing in the first place, so it's less of a loss. Still, if this post is boring to you, I blame my education.
My favorite author Roald Dahl says somewhere in one of his books."It's a gift, you either have it or you don't"
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
Woah new template!
New year, new template. I wonder if making a website is like writing in the olden days. You can pay someone to make one for you, but it is fast becoming an indispensable skillset.
The new blogger layout system makes most things easier. The archives widget lays bare the history of our posts. School must have been a great environment for writing crap. I guess NS was too, but we were phyiscally unable to blog.
The template was done using photoshop (header and background), and the rest is just CSS and blogger widgets. Do you ever get the feeling after you accomplished something that 'what the fuck that should have been easy what the hell was I doing?'
The new blogger layout system makes most things easier. The archives widget lays bare the history of our posts. School must have been a great environment for writing crap. I guess NS was too, but we were phyiscally unable to blog.
The template was done using photoshop (header and background), and the rest is just CSS and blogger widgets. Do you ever get the feeling after you accomplished something that 'what the fuck that should have been easy what the hell was I doing?'
Wednesday, February 03, 2010
Detailed Plot of the Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus
The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus.
Welcome to the imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus, an inventive world of unending landscapes, flights of fancy and ultimate indulgence. Can even have sex in there, though it is innocently pictured as a rocking gondola on a calm river. That can already be reason to say it's much classier than porn flicks.
The story starts with a traveling show, that seems just a little out of place in modern day London. As time passes, we realise that everything is not what it seems. Each character is unique and so different from the characters we are used to in our lives.
Dr Parnassus is an immortal old man who has taken bets with the devil (higher stakes but worse odds than Singapore Pools). He had regained his youth in the past in return for giving the devil any child he would have when the child turned 16. The primary reason for that bet? A pretty woman, no surprises there. Well, the family planning didn't work, I mean, I'm pretty sure the devil has a way of controlling these things. If you've watched enough horror movies you would've noticed how evil and wombs are inextricably connected, like my left ass and my right ass. Anyway, his wife died giving birth to Valentina when she was 60.
Valentina is the 2nd character. She is pretty, pretty and very pretty! That said, I'm not sure what her character was all about, maybe she is just there as a mirror for all the others.
Anton is a young swashbuckling dude taken in by Dr Parnassus who is in love with Valentina. Unfortunately, he is suffering from the always-been-there-so-girl-never-treasures-him syndrome. There is even a hilarious moment where he decides to leave the troupe, and Valentina chases after him, and says "Don't go, I need you." After she says those words, the audience can see as Anton scrunches up his expression and tries to express all the frustration of not being appreciated, but before he opens his mouth, Valentina asks, "How much money do you have with you?", ensuing laughs all round. But don't worry, he gets a happy ending! Oops I guess that's a spoiler. I know I didn't warn that there would be spoilers. But are spoilers still spoilers if they don't spoil the movie for anyone? A question for the philosophers.
Percy is a dwarf, and is primarily the voice of reason. Not that there's much in this imaginative film, but he does have a funny habit of whacking people at the knees with his stick.
That is how the film starts, with a few days before Valentina turns 16 and has to be given to the devil. Out of the blue, they rescue a guy hanging from the bridge. He is miraculously still alive, because the fucker put a small flute braced against his neck so that somehow he wouldn't die when hanged.
His name is Tony, formerly accused of scamming money from charities. When he joins is when the fun starts, by first pissing the hell out of Anton, as Valentina goes goo-goo eyes all over him. Even though Tony simply seems like like normal man, the romance is all too understandable. His mysterious past (he claims he cannot remember), boatloads of charisma, infinite amounts of business ideas and seeming all-round ability must be totally refreshing to a girl stuck in a traveling show. Tony showcases his abilities further by upgrading and bringing big bucks for the traveling show by revamping the whole thing. I just feel admiration for those who can talk with honey and hope flowing from their mouths without even pausing to stop for a breath, although they might be things as funny as "the waterfall of happiness".
Just makes me wonder, where do we find such random connections in our modern-day world, a connection that is a total breath of fresh air? Time to join a traveling circus!
Then there is the all-important imaginarium. One fact i neglected to mention earlier is that Dr. Parnassus does have powers. He can power the imagination of people and enlighten them in this imaginarium of his. In the imaginarium, however, people have to make a choice between temptations and what is right. If they choose the wrong one, their souls are taken by the devil. the right one? they'll be enlightened and purified.
The thing is this: because the Devil was so bored, he decided to give Dr Parnassus another chance. If he could enlighten 5 people before the deadline, the devil would not take Valentina. Tony helps in getting 4 women to choose the right path in the imaginarium, and what do you know, before he can get the 5th one, his past catches up with him and loansharks arrive to chase him. I told you the devil couldn't be trusted. They have a fun run in the imaginarium and Tony changes faces (Heath Ledger to Johnny Depp to Jude Law) to finally escape. Anton sees his different faces and I guess that foreshadows the fact the Tony was a conman all along. Moving on, they have about 1 hour left to get the last soul.
Anton finds a newspaper cutting with news about how Tony had scammed from charities and is determined to show it to Valentina. At this moment, Tony had just told Dr Parnassus that he is willing to be the last soul. And then Valentina arrives scolding and spitting because she has only just found out she was the pawn in the bargain. And Anton arrives with his newspaper cutting. So it is all a mad struggle and Valentina ends up getting thrown into the imaginarium and Tony goes in after her.
The scene changes to the afore-mentioned gondola, and this time it is Colin Farrell who is the lucky guy as Tony. This is also where if you're male, and you've been asleep for the whole movie, it's time to open your eyes wide. And the gondola rocks gently.
And the we see a child on the bank of the river, crying. We see Tony's dream. At his greatest moment of going to speak in a grand ballroom, however, Anton arrives as a child to unravel his dream. And we see his true self, as he blames everyone and even hits Valentina. We see how he is actually a conniving son of a bitch. Of course, that doesn't explain why he was talking about sacrificing himself as the 5th soul, and he was even going to go into the imaginarium without Valentina. Then again, this movie does not seem to be one to be reasoned out, it's much more pleasant to enjoy the slices of imagination without necessarily weaving them together. Anyhow, the ballroom in question is falling apart. Anton falls off one of the edges, and Valentina holds him. Her grip is slipping, but before it does, Anton says " I love you", and goes down, just like so many years ago in Titanic, except there was water then. Valentina is very sad, meets the devil, and chooses to give her soul to him. At which point the devil says,"damn, i've won".
This is really a very bored devil, so he tells Dr Parnussus that if he can get Tony's soul, he will bring Valentina back. That he does, by tricking Tony into using a lousy pipe the next time he's hanged, and the last scene shows Valentina and Anton having a family together. Frankly, the plot of this movie is convoluted, I think the director just got lazy in explaining the details. Valentina ended up with Anton, so it might be a case of needing an outside stimulus (Tony) to realise that we already have what we need in life. Still, it makes me wonder, after watching such a fantastical movie, why is my life so boring? The most imaginative way I can think of it is like a video game, Diablo 2. And all the skills we learn in life have different levels that we use to do all sorts of things. Anyway, I consider it a miracle if you've read till the end of this article.
Just watch the godamn movie, Lily Cole is Megan Fox x 10000000000!
Welcome to the imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus, an inventive world of unending landscapes, flights of fancy and ultimate indulgence. Can even have sex in there, though it is innocently pictured as a rocking gondola on a calm river. That can already be reason to say it's much classier than porn flicks.
The story starts with a traveling show, that seems just a little out of place in modern day London. As time passes, we realise that everything is not what it seems. Each character is unique and so different from the characters we are used to in our lives.
Dr Parnassus is an immortal old man who has taken bets with the devil (higher stakes but worse odds than Singapore Pools). He had regained his youth in the past in return for giving the devil any child he would have when the child turned 16. The primary reason for that bet? A pretty woman, no surprises there. Well, the family planning didn't work, I mean, I'm pretty sure the devil has a way of controlling these things. If you've watched enough horror movies you would've noticed how evil and wombs are inextricably connected, like my left ass and my right ass. Anyway, his wife died giving birth to Valentina when she was 60.
Valentina is the 2nd character. She is pretty, pretty and very pretty! That said, I'm not sure what her character was all about, maybe she is just there as a mirror for all the others.
Anton is a young swashbuckling dude taken in by Dr Parnassus who is in love with Valentina. Unfortunately, he is suffering from the always-been-there-so-girl-never-treasures-him syndrome. There is even a hilarious moment where he decides to leave the troupe, and Valentina chases after him, and says "Don't go, I need you." After she says those words, the audience can see as Anton scrunches up his expression and tries to express all the frustration of not being appreciated, but before he opens his mouth, Valentina asks, "How much money do you have with you?", ensuing laughs all round. But don't worry, he gets a happy ending! Oops I guess that's a spoiler. I know I didn't warn that there would be spoilers. But are spoilers still spoilers if they don't spoil the movie for anyone? A question for the philosophers.
Percy is a dwarf, and is primarily the voice of reason. Not that there's much in this imaginative film, but he does have a funny habit of whacking people at the knees with his stick.
That is how the film starts, with a few days before Valentina turns 16 and has to be given to the devil. Out of the blue, they rescue a guy hanging from the bridge. He is miraculously still alive, because the fucker put a small flute braced against his neck so that somehow he wouldn't die when hanged.
His name is Tony, formerly accused of scamming money from charities. When he joins is when the fun starts, by first pissing the hell out of Anton, as Valentina goes goo-goo eyes all over him. Even though Tony simply seems like like normal man, the romance is all too understandable. His mysterious past (he claims he cannot remember), boatloads of charisma, infinite amounts of business ideas and seeming all-round ability must be totally refreshing to a girl stuck in a traveling show. Tony showcases his abilities further by upgrading and bringing big bucks for the traveling show by revamping the whole thing. I just feel admiration for those who can talk with honey and hope flowing from their mouths without even pausing to stop for a breath, although they might be things as funny as "the waterfall of happiness".
Just makes me wonder, where do we find such random connections in our modern-day world, a connection that is a total breath of fresh air? Time to join a traveling circus!
Then there is the all-important imaginarium. One fact i neglected to mention earlier is that Dr. Parnassus does have powers. He can power the imagination of people and enlighten them in this imaginarium of his. In the imaginarium, however, people have to make a choice between temptations and what is right. If they choose the wrong one, their souls are taken by the devil. the right one? they'll be enlightened and purified.
The thing is this: because the Devil was so bored, he decided to give Dr Parnassus another chance. If he could enlighten 5 people before the deadline, the devil would not take Valentina. Tony helps in getting 4 women to choose the right path in the imaginarium, and what do you know, before he can get the 5th one, his past catches up with him and loansharks arrive to chase him. I told you the devil couldn't be trusted. They have a fun run in the imaginarium and Tony changes faces (Heath Ledger to Johnny Depp to Jude Law) to finally escape. Anton sees his different faces and I guess that foreshadows the fact the Tony was a conman all along. Moving on, they have about 1 hour left to get the last soul.
Anton finds a newspaper cutting with news about how Tony had scammed from charities and is determined to show it to Valentina. At this moment, Tony had just told Dr Parnassus that he is willing to be the last soul. And then Valentina arrives scolding and spitting because she has only just found out she was the pawn in the bargain. And Anton arrives with his newspaper cutting. So it is all a mad struggle and Valentina ends up getting thrown into the imaginarium and Tony goes in after her.
The scene changes to the afore-mentioned gondola, and this time it is Colin Farrell who is the lucky guy as Tony. This is also where if you're male, and you've been asleep for the whole movie, it's time to open your eyes wide. And the gondola rocks gently.
And the we see a child on the bank of the river, crying. We see Tony's dream. At his greatest moment of going to speak in a grand ballroom, however, Anton arrives as a child to unravel his dream. And we see his true self, as he blames everyone and even hits Valentina. We see how he is actually a conniving son of a bitch. Of course, that doesn't explain why he was talking about sacrificing himself as the 5th soul, and he was even going to go into the imaginarium without Valentina. Then again, this movie does not seem to be one to be reasoned out, it's much more pleasant to enjoy the slices of imagination without necessarily weaving them together. Anyhow, the ballroom in question is falling apart. Anton falls off one of the edges, and Valentina holds him. Her grip is slipping, but before it does, Anton says " I love you", and goes down, just like so many years ago in Titanic, except there was water then. Valentina is very sad, meets the devil, and chooses to give her soul to him. At which point the devil says,"damn, i've won".
This is really a very bored devil, so he tells Dr Parnussus that if he can get Tony's soul, he will bring Valentina back. That he does, by tricking Tony into using a lousy pipe the next time he's hanged, and the last scene shows Valentina and Anton having a family together. Frankly, the plot of this movie is convoluted, I think the director just got lazy in explaining the details. Valentina ended up with Anton, so it might be a case of needing an outside stimulus (Tony) to realise that we already have what we need in life. Still, it makes me wonder, after watching such a fantastical movie, why is my life so boring? The most imaginative way I can think of it is like a video game, Diablo 2. And all the skills we learn in life have different levels that we use to do all sorts of things. Anyway, I consider it a miracle if you've read till the end of this article.
Just watch the godamn movie, Lily Cole is Megan Fox x 10000000000!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
Posts
